The Ladies in Your Box: ‘The Real World’ Cast Snap Judgments

Welcome to The Ladies in Your Box, where we explore the meaning of women you see every day on TV. Today, we look at the reality show that started it all…

That’s right, The Real World still exists! This year, the show returns to New Orleans, where it first posted up in 2000. I personally find it amazing that people are still vying to be on this show, given that they’ve now had two decades to figure out that nothing ever comes of it except having your name dragged through the mud and a possible appearance on another MTV reality show, but that’s just me.

Because people do still apply! And that’s how we find ourselves here today. Let’s take a look at the new ladies of The Real World XXIV:

Jemmye: I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that his girl is going to be the troublemaker. How do I know? Well, she showed her pussy in her casting video, to flaunt her vagina tattoo. Also, it took all of one episode for her to try to start a fight in her underwear. She’s from the deep South, y’all, and she’s already been called trailer trash. Yes, that’s what started the fight.

Sahar: This’ll be our cryer. One episode, I’m betting, before she gets annihilated and does something she deeply regrets, and bawls all over herself and the other cast members for another entire episode, has a heart-to-heart with no one in the confessional room, says she’ll never do it again, then promptly does it again. That’s the way storylines are created, folks. Anyway, I say all this because Sahar is on her own for the first time, fleeing the confines of a “conservative Arab community,” and she’s a singer, and she needs shit to sing about.

Ashlee: Well, she’s from Jersey, which will probably make her the best cast member. Ashlee met housemate Eric in the pilot episode and it was immediately revealed that she has a thing for black guys (as, apparently, does Jemmye, which is kind of a weird thing to have as a defining character trait for two housemates, but whatever). She’s a basketball player, and she has that certain shadiness that makes me think that she’ll be the behind-the-back shit talker of the house, that leads at least one of the other characters to repeatedly yell at her: “If you have something to say to me, say it to my FACE!!!”

McKenzie: The requisite hottie. McKenzie seems sweet, naive, and like she might not have a whole lot to say. But if I’m wrong about Sahar being the cryer, then McKenzie is next in line. She’s probably the one who will get her feelings hurt repeatedly, never learn to stand up for herself even though everyone’s kind of pulling for her, and leave forgiving the whole cast for having treated her like shit throughout the season.

So predictable, aren’t they? The pilot episode is available for viewing online, and new episodes air every Wednesday night starting tonight at 10/9 central on MTV. Woot!

The Ladies in Your Box will be back next week. Stay tuned.

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