The eBabes: What To Do When Your Item Doesn’t Sell

It’s happened. The big day is finally here. The auction you listed on eBay is ending today. While you’re imagining the fortune you’ve made off of the designer dress you never wore, or the records you found in your parents’ basement, you check eBay. No one has bid on your item. No one.

Before you start crying like a dumb little baby, consider what happened. Did you make the starting price or reserve price unrealistically high? Did you take a crappy photo? Did you cover the page in Blingee gifs and include an auto-playing country song? If you answered yes to any of these, then you messed up. You have no one but yourself to blame.

One of the most important aspects of a listing is the photography. You don’t need a fancy DSLR to have nice photos, but good lighting is important. Obviously, natural light works best, but if you tend to list your items in a frenzied rush at 2am when you realize you’re about to run out of Amy’s frozen pizzas and your bank balance is in the single digits, lamps and overhead lighting will do just fine. Also, don’t be stingy and try to get away with just one image–buyers want to see multiple angles, as well as shots of any damage/stains (things we like to call “character”).

You could also consider lowering the starting price. Not everyone likes Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pizza Place memorabilia as much as you do, after all. It’s also unlikely that you’re going to make back what you spent on the item originally — even if it’s brand new. That’s why people like eBay; we can pay less for a brand new Kitchenaid blender than we would at Macy’s. If that weren’t the case, we definitely wouldn’t waste our time trolling around eBay. We have lives, you know.

Finally, include all relevant details in the description. It’s a pain to dig up a measuring tape, but buyers want to know if your porcelain lawn gnome is going to overshadow the pink flamingo they already own. You might even share the history of the item, as long as it doesn’t include any mention of smoke or urine.

Or, don’t relist it. Your bad luck could be a sign that you aren’t meant to part with your Baby-G watch. Maybe you are the only person on earth lucky enough to appreciate your item for what it is. Cherish it. And then see what other crap you have that you can try to sell on eBay.

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