Your eBay Slang Glossary

After years of happily surfing the eBay wave, it’s become apparent that there are some recurring situations that are deserving of a much better descriptor. It would just make communication with other eBay addicts so much easier. We’ve created some slang based off of pop culture. Print this. Stick it on your fridge. Make flash cards. Just learn them, okay?!

You stumbled on a super hot dress and now you can’t stop thinking about it. It’s just perfect. You want to bid on it so badly, even though it isn’t ending for another 6 days. You try to hold in the urge, but you can’t. You blow your load and bid your max 5 days out. You totally Fast Times’d it. And now she’s pregnant!

You knew you were going to win this auction. You had it in the bag. But, then — out of nowhere — some totally random user wins it. They definitely cheated, and you just got Flicked. Tracy Flicked.

You have this really good Nike hookup on eBay. You have a feeling your sweet kicks might be stolen out of the back of a delivery truck while the driver is eating a donut. But you don’t care–high tops for $45 bucks, man! It’s some Blow!

You found a vintage trench coat starting at $10. The title reads, “Old Rain Coat, Comfortable.” You know it’s YSL. It’s a Grandma’s Boy.

You find an amazing Chanel purse. It’s beautiful and guaranteed to be authentic. And then you receive it. And it becomes painfully clear it is not the same Chanel purse that you’ve been admiring all this time, but rather a Channel purse. Not to say that it doesn’t have charms of its own, but it’s a Roxanne.

You and 100 other people are following a super hot item. We’re talking super hot here, like Britney Spears’ used Cheetos bag or something. Of everyone who is following it, you were the winning bidder. You were the Can’t Hardly Wait.

Have you ever won something on eBay that was really cool and trendy? A crop top perhaps, or a tribal print romper? If it just doesn’t look right on you, we’re sorry — but you just bought a Ronald Miller. Can’t Buy Me Love, guys! Come on!

You get an item, and it just doesn’t work. You try to wear it to work — no. You try to wear it out — nope. And then, one magical day months later, you try it on and it magically works. It was a Rudy! The crowd goes wild!!

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