Motley Crue lead singer Vince Neil has never suffered from a lack of groupies in his life. But what do you do when you smell like sex when you’re trying to get another girl to have sex with you? According to Neil, you should rub egg burritos on your crotch in order to get rid of the sex smell. That story would be even awesomer if I hadn’t read about Tommy Lee doing the same thing – and probably more sexily – in the band’s autobiography, The Dirt. Neil told Hustler:
So our dicks smelled of eggs… We would tell our girlfriends, ‘Oh, we dropped the burritos in our laps.’ The girlfriends thought we were a bunch of clumsy slobs. We never thought about going into the restroom and just washing our dicks.
As dumb and totally gross as rubbing an egg burrito on your crotch is, it apparently worked. In Jillian Lauren’s book Some Girls, about time she spent in a royal harem in Brunei, she reported multiple women who each bragged about having a promise ring from Vince Neil. Those are some dedicated groupies who will screw a guy whose dick smells like eggs.