Why We Put Up With Skinny Jeans

After a nice dinner, or a night out at a bar, all I want to do is come home and get the fuck out of my skinny jeans. Seriously, I can’t get out of them fast enough — many has been the night that I have taken them off immediately upon walking in the door (I’m a rebel!).

And I know I’m not alone — skinny jeans, friends, were never intended to be left on the body, constricting the diaphragm, squashing the stomach, asphyxiating the spleen, for more than a few hours. So why do we put up with them? Here are a few reasons:

  1. You can wear them with boots, and you don’t have to shave your legs.
  2. Your other jeans haven’t been washed for a month are in the laundry.
  3. You’re a masochist.
  4. Honestly? Even though jeans are supposed to be really comfortable, very few of them are. So it’s not like if you swapped out your skinny jeans for your high-waisteds or your low-riders, you’d be in much better shape.

I know some of you will say that you’ve said “go fuck yourself” to the trend of skinny jeans, and I salute you for that. And if you know of a pair of jeans that act as jeans are supposed to act — with comfort, forgiveness and yes, trust — please let me know.

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    • Elle

      Crushing your diaphragm? I think you’re confusing skinny jeans with mom jeans. Skinny jeans are totally comfortable. Maybe you should start buying pants in your size. They even make plus sized skinny jeans, so there’s no reason for anyone to be buying jeans that are five sizes too small.

    • porkchop

      Skinny jeans are the devil, and if my old jeans wear out before this trend is over, then I will be wearing skirts for the duration.

    • verbatim

      Man + skinny jeans = gay

    • Connie

      answer = jeggings.

    • zan

      seriously, shopped around and not in the juniors section! once you find a skinny pair that accomodates a woman’s hips and ass you’ll realize how flattering they really are.

    • marla

      crushing your diphragm, stomach and spleen? you’re wearing a corset, not skinny jeans :) switch to them – low rise, elastic denim and a good fit will get you anywere

    • Kate!

      I still wear flares. I AM THAT COOL.

      (and I rip them off the second I’m in the garage.)


    • Megan

      Delia’s. Surprisingly. Just a bit low rise, just a bit stretchy.

    • Zooey

      american eagle is perfection. But the trick when buying skinny jeans is to buy what i call the “fake jegging”, something that calls itself a jegging but is really just a pair of regular looking skinny jeans that are super stretchy but retain their shape, and always fit perfectly. levi’s makes an awesome one too.