What, What In The Butt

The Journal of Sexual Medicine has released a new sex survey about who’s boning whom and how, where, why and at what age, and as one might imagine, it’s quite revealing.

Mostly, reports William Saletan of Slate, it has some interesting findings regarding butt sex. Turns out that anal is on the rise, which surprises no one, but also that more women who report having anal also report having orgasms:

“Among women who had vaginal sex in their last encounter, the percentage who said they reached orgasm was 65. Among those who received oral sex, it was 81. But among those who had anal sex, it was 94. Anal sex outscored cunnilingus.”

Apparently, the report found that women who regularly tried different things in the sack were more sexually satisfied — so, a little fellatio here, some vaginal intercourse there, throw in some anal for good measure and BAM, 94%.

But unfortunately, in his research of the topic, Saletan had only read accounts of women who hate it in the butt, because here’s his take on this ograsa-nomenon:

“So why did the inclusion of anal sex bump the orgasm figure up to 94 percent? It didn’t. The causality runs the other way. Women who were getting what they wanted were more likely to indulge their partners’ wishes. It wasn’t the anal sex that caused the orgasms. It was the orgasms that caused the anal sex.”

Later, after hearing from women who like anal in the comments, Saletan confirmed that his depiction of anal sex as some sort of reward for men who get their women off sprang from his lack of research…or, he suggests, women’s lack of willingness to shout out their enjoyment of ass penetration:

I’ll confess I began with skepticism because of the obvious physiological factors (and non-factors) and because there is so much anecdotal evidence from women who hate it. (e.g. http://www.democraticwings.com/democraticwings/archives/womens_rights/3078.php) But even if the vast majority of women feel that way, a minority who like it — and who don’t speak up loudly about their opinions, for obvious reasons — could produce the numbers seen in this survey (around 7% monthly, and 3-4% in last encounter).

I don’t want to jump down Saletan’s throat here, because…I don’t know, I’m not in the mood. But I’m more than a little surprised by his analysis of the situation, mostly because I do not find women to be at all shy about enjoying taking it in the ass. Sure, some women hate it. But I know more women who either like it, or like a finger up there, or like trying new things, that Saletan’s suggestion that they’d be having anal sex only for their partner’s pleasure seems completely off the mark.

What about you? Do you know women (or are you one) who like it in the butt?

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    • Eileen

      Well, let’s look at it this way:

      1) Anal has the potential to hurt a lot.
      2) Anal is still somewhat taboo (more so than vaginal or oral sex).

      The more I love and trust someone, the more likely I am to have an orgasm while with him – and the more likely I am to be okay with pushing society’s “norms” with him. Similarly, the more he proves that he knows what he’s doing, the more likely I am to let him do something that could potentially really, really hurt me.

      So while I don’t think that anal is the prize for orgasms, I do think that men who are good in bed are more likely to be getting anal sex. If that makes sense at all.

      • nolalola27

        This, 100%.

      • RJ

        I don’t agree with this at all. Love and trust don’t increase orgasms, orgasms are physical. Maybe you feel more relaxed with someone you love/trust, but the orgasm is still strictly physical.

        And I don’t think anal sex is taboo at all. With the rise of porn culture that’s happened in the last 10 years, anal sex has become as mundane as regular sex or blowjobs.

        The odds that anal sex is seriously going to injure anyone are pretty low. About the only way that could happen is if the guy’s penis ruptures the woman’s colon, and that’s rare. Anal sex hurts, sure, but it’s not usually going to hurt anyone.

        My point is, I don’t believe anal sex is done because a woman has developed a great, profound trust in the other person and is willing to brave personal injury because she knows that he knows how to expertly wield his magic stick. That’s just not reality. What is reality? Not sure, but I’m guessing people usually have anal sex because the guy wants to and the girl wants him to be happy. I’m also guessing that most times the girl won’t like it.

    • Leah

      I think some reasonable points were made here. Personally, I can’t bring myself to be with someone who wants to do something that physically hurts me to get themselves off. Where is the line?

      • RJ

        I think it’s kind of ridiculous to say you can’t “bring yourself to be with someone” just because they want anal sex. Not pressuring you into it, not guilting you into it, just merely WANTING it. You’re just being a drama queen.

        Besides, anal sex doesn’t hurt every woman, only some women.

    • G

      Four words. I hate prune juice.

    • Anon

      If it hurts, you’re doing it wrong

    • Wood

      I have had an incredible amount of success driving women to wild, multiple orgasms through anal sex. None of the women had previous experience with anal, but in treating them like ladies and introducing something exciting…..I have seen more than one quiet, shy librarian type screaming for joy in orgasm.

      What a woman thinks of her body is a BIG DEAL……women with nice asses are aware of their “attributes”, and enjoy the attention paid that is not often sufficiently provided. If you know what you’re doing, the impact to a woman’s sexuality can’t be overstated. It is a very deep connection, and literally tears down many walls, and frees her to let go.

      I am understating the level of experience……treat it like just another sexual act, and you might provide one of the most powerful experiences of her life. You MUST take your time, and use lubricant freely. Be very gentle, and massage her anal opening slowly, and deliberately….make it very sensual. I had more than one woman say they never had an orgasm, but anal provided the first orgasms of their life. Most are well built, and had very sexy, rounded asses. I’ve also have more than one where anal was the primary penetrative activity, as I drove them completely out of control with pleasure.

      As a man…..I enjoy doing it to them, but much better, watching the extreme pleasure she is getting. That’s the real prize!

      • Wood

        This is a quote from a woman who I introduced to anal sex after reading the Saletan article. It is the only way she can have an orgasm.

        Great article, it appears more of mainstream is experimenting with anal sex. Of course, I have experienced the Ultimate Big O and that was only acheived thru anal sex. But we have taken the anal experience to whole different level. I doubt if anal sex will become a norm for society. Society is most comfortable with conventional sexual practice.

        I was receptive to anal sex from the first time you introduced to me. I remember clearly, the feeling and pleasure derived from it. I had never experienced such pleasure in my entire life, it most certainly was unforgettable.

      • Jill M. Carrol

        I don’t buy your Cosmo-Boy pose, sorry.

    • Jill M. Carrol

      I don’t buy your Cosmo-Boy pose, sorry.

    • RJ

      I don’t agree with this at all. Love and trust don’t increase orgasms, orgasms are physical. Maybe you feel more relaxed with someone you love/trust, but the orgasm is still strictly physical.

      And I don’t think anal sex is taboo at all. With the rise of porn culture that’s happened in the last 10 years, anal sex has become as mundane as regular sex or blowjobs.

      The odds that anal sex is seriously going to injure anyone are pretty low. About the only way that could happen is if the guy’s penis ruptures the woman’s colon, and that’s rare. Anal sex hurts, sure, but it’s not usually going to hurt anyone.

      My point is, I don’t believe anal sex is done because a woman has developed a great, profound trust in the other person and is willing to brave personal injury because she knows that he knows how to expertly wield his magic stick. That’s just not reality. What is reality? Not sure, but I’m guessing people usually have anal sex because the guy wants to and the girl wants him to be happy. I’m also guessing that most times the girl won’t like it.

      Then again, who knows?

      • RJ

        Sorry, this was supposed to be a reply.

    • Meco

      I’ve been around the block a few times. I’ve had a lot of wives in my time, I even married a few. But one thing that fires up more women than most is passion. Most Need Excitement to off set what they consider to be boring lives. and the ones that live like on the edge are even more intresting. I love women, and whether its Anal, Oral or Vaginal, I love to get women off. Most guys aproach Anal sex like its a dirty thing and that his lady won’t like it. Women like to be teased and to feel that the guy in control knows what he’s doing. But the time I am ready to take her there, the pump has been primed and she is all but begging for it. Foreplay should take at least an hour. Unleash the beast with in her and she’ll be all yours.

    • dutchman

      The article corresponds to my personal experiences, getting started in the sixties and seventies. I was requested to do anal by a girlfriend who preferred it for giving her ´whole body orgasms´, in her words.
      At that time, girls who found either giving or receiving oral sex ´dirty´ were not uncommon, but even the ´nicest´, well-brought up ladies were perfectly prepared or sex games with their bottoms.
      The 40 % figure coincides pretty exactly with my empirical experiences, for women who say it was the most intense enjoyment they had.
      Just a note on being the ´donor´. A well lubricated rectum does not feel radically tighter or different to a vagina. The joy of making love this way is more about the recipient´s obvious pleasure, for me at least.
      I can understand that or those who have for one reason or another not tried it that it could be seen as either demeaning or unhygienic. In over for decades I never personally once experienced ´pollution´, it was always a mutual activity, and the emotional closeness afterwards was often greater than after vaginal intercourse, even when we were trying for a baby

      • dutchman

        Sorry, I forgot to mention, my personal preference is for plain old vanilla sex, in the missionary position no less, but I´m willing to try anything a partner likes, with few exceptions