Tell Us About Your Thrisis

Last Night we stopped by the Thrisis party to celebrate Andrea Lavinthal and Jessica Rozler’s new book Your So Called Life. There was champagne! There were manicures! There were amazing canapes from Kitchen125 (from whom I stole this picture).

And, best of all, there were plenty of other people to share our Thrisis concerns with.

Now, you might be wondering what a Thrisis is. It’s sort of like a mid-life crisis – except you’re far from mid-life. You’re 27. Or, you’re hovering somewhere around 30, and you still sort of feel like a teenager. We’ll let Andrea and Jessica’s book fill you in:

Your-So-Called-Life is the Rest-Of-Your-Life Crisis, the beginning of the seventy-five percent of your time on this planet that isn’t sponsored by American Apparel. And, as you move to your real adult years, you start asking yourself the kind of deep, philosophical questions that can send even the sanest woman to the therapist like, What is my purpose? Can I really have it all? And, am I too over-the-hill to be watching The Hills? This is also a time when you realize that someday is actually today, tomorrow really is tomorrow instead of the distant future, and the future only belongs to the future itself… and the future is Electric Youth! (Thanks for clearing that last part up for us, Debbie – sorry, Deborah – Gibson.)”

Look, here at TheGloss, we don’t miss our early 20′s, except when we do. But we all have mini-Thrises as we move towards becoming a genuine adults. Some of us worry about having a career on track, but OMG secretly needing love, just like Reese Witherspoon in Sweet Home Alabama, and having to teach our cats to dial 911 (Mr. Whiskers monitors my life alert bracelet). Some of us worry about the fact that we’re unemployed and not in a “sipping prosecco on the balcony of our Italian villa” way. Some of us worry about the fact that we can’t stay out drinking tequila shots until 4 in the morning without feeling like we’re going to die the next morning.

What do you stress over now that you’re not living in your dorm room anymore? Tell us, because we’ve got what you want to get you through it. We’ve got what you need. We’ve got a copy of the book. Leave your mid-twenties stress in the comments, and this Friday, we’ll send the best response Your So Called Life.

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    • Lindsay Hartman

      My thrises… Last week a really close friend had some personal trauma. She really needed someone to talk to. It’s a girl that I’ve known since I was in middle school. So like any good friend, I stayed up all night on the phone, listening and trying to help the best I could. Since I was up, I figured that I might as well have a beer, or a couple, or ten. It was past 2:30am when I crawled into bed.

      The next morning, I was a complete wreck. With a pounding headache and enormous bags under my eyes, I quickly showered and got ready. (Quickly because I was already running late.) I was so hungover that I actually had to leave work and go back to bed around 1. It was humiliating. But at the same time, I felt completely justified for staying up all night, helping my friend.

      In college, I just would have skipped class. But skipping work isn’t nearly so easy. The whole thing just made me stop and say, “What the hell am I doing? I’m not a kid anymore! I can’t drink a 6 pack before bed and think I’ll be functioning at work the next day!” I felt like an immature idiot. Thankfully, my boss never even brought it up again. And I decided that there could be no more drinks on work nights, no matter who is having an emotional evening.

      It may not sound like a huge deal, but it made me think a lot about being a grown up with grown up responsibilities. And how we handle these new responsibilities seems to be at the crux of every thrises I’ve ever had.

    • Lindsay Hartman

      thrisis* Sorry!

    • nolalola27

      I’m afraid that I’m not on the villa sipping prosecco, I don’t have the autonomy in my job I’d like to have, it doesn’t feel like a “career,” but I’m too old to be batting that kind of sh*t around, aren’t I?

      Another big one is, “Do I want a kid, ever?” I’M 27 AND I DON’T KNOW IF I REALLY WANT TO BE A MOTHER. I battle, mostly, with the fear that any urges I feel for becoming a mother are motivated by the wrong reasons (biology, society, vanity). I know I’d be a good mom, and I know you’re never really “prepared” to have a kid, but I just want to know if I really WANT a kid, and if I do, for the right reasons.

      Also I’m afraid of getting saggy & wrinkled. I know that won’t happen in my 30′s, but still. That much closer, ya know?

    • Eileen

      I think the most disheartening thing for me about this article is that I actually know a woman who casually Facebook posted awhile ago about sitting prosecco at the Italian villa.

    • nicoleshoe

      Every day I ask myself if I have made the right decisions, am I on the right path? I just turned 29 and have no want or need for marriage or kids, but keep asking myself, is something wrong with me because of it?
      I feel like I should be farther in my career than I am and hope I’m the only one!!! It’s very hard to look at the positive things I have accomplished. I can live on my own, pay my own rent, finally bought a new car, received a master’s degree….
      But we always just dwell so much on what we haven’t done within a certain amount of time. Why is everything focused on that tiny little number, looming over us like some impressionable giant?
      I can only hope that my thirties will be better…and that things will become more clear.

    • Leah

      I’m afraid that I spent so much time worrying about wanting to grow up and being older and responsible, and now that I have it wish I could have more freedom again. I also worry that I’ll never grow out of my “grass is always greener” phase.