As we graduate from college and head out to face the real world, our lives tend to change. 1:00 p.m. stops being the average time that we wake up, Cap’n Crunch stops being acceptable for all three meals, and there are no longer dining halls where we can swipe a magic card and eat “for free.”
Along the same lines, there are some drinks that you should leave behind with your student ID. Here are a few of them:
- Sex on the Beach. College should be the last time that you use the act of ordering a drink as a thinly veiled attempt to get guys to think about you naked.
- Anything from a funnel. It’s cute, it’s fun, it’s over when you throw that hat in the air.
- Long Island Iced Tea. After you figure out what this drink is, it takes no more than three weeks of ordering it exclusively before it ends badly — once, or more than once — and then, in theory, you never order it again.
- Screwdrivers. You actually should have left these behind in middle school.
- Any kind of vodka out of a plastic bottle. Vodka isn’t supposed to taste like rubbing alcohol…and you know this.