Love Is Real

Hey, good/bad news, love is a real biological phenomenon! Which is great, because the next time you’re watching Casablanca with your and she turns to you and says “love isn’t real, it doesn’t exist,” you can be like, “hell yes, it does. Science, bitch.” That’ll shut her up. Also, things will get better once you’re out of high school.

However, it’s bad, because it means those ideas about how you’re going to slowly fall madly in love with that guy who is really, really nice if you just hang in long enough aren’t really true, at least from a chemical standpoint. According to the meta-analysis study conducted by Syracuse University Professor Stephanie Ortigue:

When a person falls in love, 12 areas of the brain work in tandem to release euphoria-inducing chemicals such as dopamine, oxytocin, adrenaline and vasopression. The love feeling also affects sophisticated cognitive functions, such as mental representation, metaphors and body image…falling in love takes about 1/5 of a second.

See that? One fifth of a second. You may come to have a different kind of love with nice guy Joe, but you’ll never love him the way you did Bad Boy Billy. Probably because Billy had a motorcycle.

But doesn’t the chemical aspect of love fade away? Sure, it may be real, but is it enough to mean that you really want to go through life with a flat-worldist who has a soul patch?

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    • G

      I’m confused. That “science” basically describes infatuation in my book. Now, infatuation is more than physical attraction. It’s an attraction that relates to someone’s whole person…But I wouldn’t call it love. Although, in the end it probably all comes down to how you define it.