7 Men You Should Avoid Dating

Let’s face it: dating’s rough. You don’t know who people are until the moment they show their true colors. Whether that moment is them sending you smiley and wink faces via text message or when they yell (like really yell) at the guy who stole your cab, it’s difficult to pin-point who a person really is before you fall too deep into a relationship. AskMen.com wrote a guide of the five types of women men should avoid dating so men can fit each girl they meet into one of these general stereotypes and if the girl doesn’t fit, then she’s totally dateable. Just because I get nervous and hide behind my humor and that sometimes makes me look like a smart ass doesn’t mean you should avoid dating me. It just means I’m hilarious but not quite comfortable enough with you yet. So really, I shouldn’t date you. I probably also shouldn’t date the guy whose pick-up line is, “You’re hotter than two mice making love in a wool sock.” I did the math and there are probably more than seven men women should avoid dating. But for simplicity’s sake, these are the general categories of male personalities that are just un-dateable:

1. The Un-Motivated

This guy can be really, really cool. At first. And then you realize he has no life plan. And he’s 28. He may have all these dreams and aspirations but no way of actually achieving them. And more importantly, he doesn’t exactly have the intention of achieving them either. This is the guy who settles for the easy life. The life where he gets a job that can pay the bills but doesn’t exactly make him happy. He has more free time than necessary, which can lead to much unwanted clinginess (Stage 5 Clingers don’t only apply to girls). And since you’re the one who has her life figured out and you’re ready to start thinking about settling down, he will only hold you back.

2. Mommy’s Dearest

A mama’s boy can be a really great guy. Take Albie Manzo (Caroline Manzo’s oldest and cuter son from The Real Housewives of New Jersey), for instance. Albie is adorable, successful and genuine. Except … he’s a little too attached to his mom. Dating a guy who’s really close to his mom can mean that you end up dating his mom. You’ll start to hang out with her a little more often than normal, she’ll know more of your faults than you’d like her to know and eventually, talking to her about her son will get uncomfortable. She’ll talk to you like she owns him. I’m serious. Just because she bore him and raised him gives her all the credit in the world to be his number one. Over you. And even if he claims differently, it will always be mommy first.

3. All His Friends Are Single

A guy whose friends are all single can be risky. This means that his buddies will always get mad at him for hanging out with just you. They will resent you for taking him away from them, even if it’s once or twice a week. It also could mean that your guy wants to stay single, too. Since none of his friends are encouraging him to commit, he is less likely to do so. Friends can be a huge influence on a guy, so always be aware of what his friends are like. Who he’s friends with can be very telling of what kind of guy he is, too.

4. The Psycho

Ah, my favorite kind. (Just kidding.) This psycho is very similar to AskMen.com’s female “psycho” type. This is a guy who calls you or texts you what feels like a bajillion times a day. This is a guy who asks you where you were if you didn’t pick up the phone or call him back right away. This is a guy who thinks you’re dating and you’re not. Psycho’s are a must to avoid. They can drive you crazy and make you say or do things you may regret. And beware of the sex. It’s likely to be amazing. But careful, because it’s a trap. He’s psycho before and after sex, remember? Oh yea, the psycho usually uses emoticons in texts. That should be your first sign.

5. The Smart Ass

Yea, I’m throwing this one right back at the guys, too. Male smart asses tend to be mean. Not just mean to you, but mean to other people. He can be slightly racist and very judgmental. He may be able to make you laugh, but humor should be used with taste and class. No one wants to date a Dane Cook or a Tucker Max or a guy that undermines you with humor. Undermining you with anything, really, should be out of the question.

6. The Gamer

Ughhh gamers. And the worst part is, I’m convinced 90 percent of the male population are gamers. There really is no need for an explanation of what kind of guy this is. But here’s why you should avoid him: he talks in LOL-speak; he will play video games while you’re sleeping which will then in turn wake you up; he will play video games while talking to you on the phone and will therefore not listen to a word you’re saying; he has weirdo friends in other countries whom he has never met and talks about how you two should go visit them rather than actually visit the country; he will turn down hanging out with you because he’s “hanging out with his buddies” when really, he’s hanging out by himself playing video games and his buddies are virtual; he has no life.

7. There’s Always Something More Important Than You

This guy is attached to his phone. And by attached, I mean he keeps it in his lap or on the table at dinner waiting for someone more important than you to call, text or e-mail him. He will immediately check his phone anytime it alerts him and he sleeps with it. Not next to him on his night table. With it, like under his pillow in his hand. This is a guy who may seem into you, but in reality, he’s distracted. He is always more interested in anything that’s going elsewhere. I don’t know about you, but I’d rather date a guy who likes me better than his phone.

Have you ever dated one of these guys (or a mix of any of the categories)?

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    • Lorraine

      Combine 2, 3, 6 and 7 and you will have my ex-husband!

    • k

      i would add “the pleaser” as the opening paragraph echoed the same second-guessing i’ve had since my last romantic involvement. i should have known better because i figured out this guy’s tendency to morph with the moment early on in our friendship, but he’s pretty talented, and i allowed myself to be charmed. the problem was, i had little idea of what he was really thinking at any moment when we were dating because he wanted me to approve of him. i realized after he broke off our relationship “to work on himself alone” and immeadiately started chasing some of our mutual female friends that he was more a liar than anything else. being fooled like that gives me shivers, but i’m pretty sure that many guys think morphing into whatever shape a girl wants is a good idea….the problem is eventually the ugly side comes back out. my fault for ignoring that i already knew it existed.

      • bgg

        just a corollary to that theory: while the majority of guys you meet exhibiting those symptoms may well be the douches you’d expect, please be mindful of guys who sincerely go through changes during the time you spend together. Sadly, the dividing line can only be seen post-relationship, so i probably shouldn’t have posted this in the first place.

    • nerdypaws

      I married #6 because I’m a gamer too. I do agree that Our Kind should not breed out. But the game obsession, lol-speak, and the fact that our free time is scheduled around our gaming is the best part for me! Also, when I need him distracted for a few hours, all it takes is one unsupervised trip to Best Buy and I have some very precious ‘me time.’ #6 might not be exciting, but we’re predictable and well trained!

      • Marisa

        I’ve been with a gamer for 3 years and couldn’t be happier. I’m also NOT a gamer by any means. Though no one believes me (including my bf), I genuinely enjoy watching him play! And if I don’t, it’s always an excuse to take a nap or read alone. :)

    • Somnilee

      3, 5, 6, 7 all in one is my ex-boyfriend :/

    • bodo

      lol it’s leet-speak

      • Female Gamer


    • Jaime Richards

      I adore your article!!! I own happily-ever-afters.com so I’m “content-picky” when it comes to dating articles! Yours rocks. :) I almost married a number 1 once. The only thing I don’t quite agree with is a posted comment. While the “pleaser” described sounds horrible, I actually think that “Pleasers” in the generally healthy sense are incredible men! If we, as women, can not handle having someone in our lives that is interested in pleasing us, then we have a problem that WE need to rectify!

    • G

      I’d excuse a guy for number 7 if he’s a surgeon or on-call, or if he has a kid who doesn’t live with him. But those two things are things you should know about him BEFORE you start getting annoyed about him sleeping with his phone. I also thing a Gamer is fine as long as he’s with another Gamer. As far as Smart Ass, there is a fine line there and it really is hard to tell when the relationship first starts out. Some guys are just abrasive with their language but their actions are really sweet. This happens with guys and girls alike. I think it’s a defense mechanism.

    • RN

      #5 is tough because a lot of women can’t handle real criticism.

      It’s basically like this, a woman nitpicks a man’s flaw. He reverses the tables and returns insults in her direction and all of a sudden, he’s a wise guy.

    • unfa

      Oh no! I can see myself to be nr. 1 :P
      And I tend to belive that a love will make me go for a better life.
      But sometimes I think i should get the ~~~~ up and stop ~~~~~~~~ around – and then I might find love. Life first. Then love. Looks like finding love before life isn’t possible and/or healthy ;)

      I also was a little 4 but I understood that I was acting like a psycho so I think I got slowly cured from that.

    • Nappyface

      screw you guys – im a smartass and my girlfriend loves it.

    • thegrimmling

      Well, I am partially 3,5,6 and a sometimes 7. My relationship is doing fine. It also helps that she is also a 2,5,6 person too.

      As for 7 goes, you ladies need to realize that some people work jobs where they need to be on-call and need their phone near them at all times.

      My wife is the type that would look at this and say that this article is mostly generalizations that most people would fit into.

      I should text her this, I have only sent her 7 messages today….lol

    • LOL

      “No one wants to date a Dane Cook or a Tucker Max or a guy that undermines you with humor. ”

      No, but you dames will fark the hell out of those guys, tho. ;)

    • Rawrz

      Gamers can be some of the sweetest people, and the article describing them is very stereotyped. Perhaps it’s because I am one too. However, if he is a gamer, and unmotivated, STAY AWAY. FAR FAR AWAY.

    • Pixie

      Well… what if I’m a gamer too? And he is the best multi-tasker in the world, because he talks more than me on the phone. And almost every guy I know uses emoticons. (I’m 18, so are most of the guys I talk to.) Plus Dane Cook is freakin’ awesome. :P

    • Kristen

      My husband is a motivated Gamer. He gets the 2 player games so we can play together, and after a long day at work who wouldn’t want to take their frustrations out on an unsuspecting group of cannibalistic aliens? We also compromise when it comes to the gaming….I don’t think Gamers are bad guys and like you said 90% of guys are most likely gamers. It’s the Obsessive gamer you need to watch out for.

    • Anon

      well gamers yous their hands for 4-30+ hours a week…that could be interesting…

      also its leetspeak. not lolspeak. even noobs like you should know this. and leetspeak is down right sexy.

    • jrex918

      “so that pretty much i eliminated 90 percent of the population”
      ummm,yeahhh muthafuckaaaa, you just did; lol this is one of the most shallow blogs ive ever seen in a long time! like daaaamn youre just goanna determine if a person is date-able or not by his hobbies and characteristics? the fuck? in that case this person is better off single; this blogger is the kind of person who expects you to fit her mold or else she wont date you; somebody who cant you for who you are should BE AVOIDED AT ALL COSTS! lol

    • jrex918

      “so that pretty much eliminated 90 percent of the population”
      ummm,yeahhh muthafuckaaaa, you just did; lol this is one of the most shallow blogs ive ever seen in a long time! like daaaamn youre just goanna determine if a person is date-able or not by his hobbies and characteristics? the fuck? in that case this person is better off single; this blogger is the kind of person who expects you to fit her mold or else she wont date you; somebody who cant accept you for who you are should BE AVOIDED AT ALL COSTS! lol