Love and Other Drugs with Jake Gyllenhaal and Anne Hathaway is coming out Thanksgiving weekend and every time I see the trailer I think the same thing: what kind of guy would EVER stop a coach bus on the highway just to tell some girl on it he loves her? You know what I’m talking about. That scene in the trailer where Jake Gyllenhaal is in his sports car racing the bus Anne Hathaway is on (probably to escape him) and manages to pull it over so he can climb aboard and tell confess his true love for her and probably apologize for whatever he did to make her get on the bus in the first place. Yeah, that would never happen in real life. Let’s be honest: he’d probably just send her a text message.
Romantic comedies have perfected the nonsensical love proclamation. Men and women are professing their love for each other on crowded planes, on highways and during shooting sprees in minivans (yeah, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie would have totally been dead if that scene from Mr. and Mrs. Smith happened in real life … which it wouldn’t). The only time I’ve ever seen a risky love proclamation was when I was walking in Central Park one day and noticed everyone looking up. Some guy had paid one of those aerial sky banner people to write “I love you, will you marry me?” in the sky. Maybe I haven’t lived long enough to see or experience events that come right out of the movies, but I feel like most of the time, Hollywood paints a pretty unrealistic picture of how people proclaim their love for each other. So to ruin all your romantic dreams come true, we’ve come up with more realistic alternatives to these love proclamations made in films over the years.