• Mon, Nov 15 2010

Loehmann’s Files for Bankruptcy, Jewish Girls Everywhere Heard Weeping

Loehmann’s, the legendary New York City-based chain of discounted designer stores, has filed for bankruptcy. As a Jewish girl who is too broke to go full-on JAP, one of my first orders of business upon moving to the Big Apple was spending an afternoon wrestling grandmas for 70-percent-off coats at the store’s Brooklyn outpost. Really, you haven’t lived until somebody’s bubbe has punched you in the face because you ripped a Chanel suit out of her hands.

So what’s a bargain lover to do? Luckily, none of the stores appear to be closing just yet (25 locations closed over the past few years, but there are still plenty open. Fine one here). So if you want them to remain open, go down there and buy some shmattes already. Your unborn grandchildren will thank you. Especially when they snag marked-down prom dresses that make them look totally hotter than that bitch Becky Schwartzenstein.

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  • Jessica Pauline Ogilvie

    Noooo…..noooo…my Jewish heart breaks….I’m going to Loehmann’s rack tonight to try to right this terrible, terrible wrong….