• Wed, Dec 8 2010

But Oprah, Aren’t We All ‘Kind of a Lesbian’?

In an upcoming interview with Barbara Walters, Oprah (Winfrey) puts the kibosh on rumors that she and BFF Gayle are secret lovers. According to People.com, Oprah tells Walters that “I’m not a lesbian…I’m not even kind of a lesbian.” And to that I say: I think the lady doth protest too much.

Because let’s just be honest here: we’re all kind of a lesbian! Even men are kind of lesbians. I mean, who among us doesn’t love boobs? Who doesn’t flip through the SI swimsuit issue and experience enjoyment even despite our envy-induced rage? Why does anyone watch the Victoria’s Secret fashion show?

That’s right — it’s because we’re all kind of a lesbian. Some more than others, some less. But you only have a one in seven chance of being a zero on the Kinsey scale, and Oprah, that means the odds are against you. Heck, they’re against all of us — or really, they’re in all of our favor. Because if you don’t appreciate cleavage even a little bit, I’m not sure I want to know you.

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  • Lisa

    To play devil’s advocate here: if “lesbian” is the absolute term meaning “attracted to women and NEVER to men”, then even a bisexual person (…Oprah?) isn’t at all a lesbian. Or straight, for that matter.

    Also, there’s the question of the sexualization of women. Is the pleasure that women might get from viewing the Victoria’s Secret show or the SI swimsuit issue necessarily sexual, even if they do happen to be bi or lesbians? Perhaps some acknowledgment that a picture of a girl is “sexy” combines with the socially-programmed impulse to shop and look for ways to look attractive in a way similar to that of the models gives viewers a kind of non-sexual pleasure that doesn’t necessarily mark them as “kinda lesbian.” That said, does it sound any weirder to you (woman or man, or Ms. Ogilvie, or anyone willing to test their perceptions) to say that “men are all kind of gay”? Here are words doing their thing and having connotations again.

  • Lindsay Cross

    Um… I’m not sure about the philosophy behind the whole thing. And Lisa, you asked some great questions that I’m just not sure I can answer. But… as a happily married straight woman, I love a good rack.

  • porkchop

    Maybe Oprah is that 1 in 7–she is a special lady after all. Or maybe she just hasn’t met the right girl :D