Poll: Do You Think Men Are Intimidated By You?

We’ve all heard this before, right, ladies? Sometimes, our most successful single friends are convinced that they intimidate men, and that’s why they find themselves alone.

Well, I’ll be frank. Whenever I hear someone say that, I just want to call bullshit. But I don’t, because that would be mean, and usually what’s going on is that my friend is feeling down about being single and wants to find a reason for it that involves boosting herself up instead of putting herself down.

Which is fine, and as a friend, it’s not my job to tell her that she sounds like an egomaniac — it’s my job to be supportive (and then blog about it later to a world full of strangers!).

So, what do you think? Do you believe that men are intimidated by you? Have you seen proof? Or do you think that it’s another reason that women give ourselves when in reality, perhaps someone is — I’m going to say it! — just not that into us?

Sorry! This poll is now closed.

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    • L

      I have no idea. I think I’m intimidating, but not in a powerful way-more like “don’t talk to her seriously she will kill you with a head of lettuce”. However, this isn’t exactly backed by people approaching me. All the time. I never try to make friends, but they all gravitate to the girl in the corner reading and just wanting to be left alone. I think it’s because they know that I won’t interrupt them while they’re rambling at me.

    • Shel

      I think the better looking girls tend to intimidate men, like a model seeming to be unapproachable. Or a wealthy woman.

      If it’s a friend down on her luck, well, why nor just try to make her feel better somehow? We all make up excuses for our silly behavior.

    • Eileen

      Maybe one or two men have admitted to having been intimidated by me when they first met me, but if you’re around me for more than five minutes it’s pretty much guaranteed that you’ll hear me make at least one silly, risque, or just plain awful joke, and no one’s intimidated after that. Even if you’re intimidated of someone, if she’s interesting you’ll pay attention to her – and if she’s a nice, kind, normal person, some of that will probably show through soon enough that she isn’t scary. So, no, I don’t think “she’s intimidating” is a good reason for why women are single.

    • Lindsay Cross

      I refuse to vote for anything that agrees with Steve Harvey, but I’m not a fan of the whole “intimidating” argument. Beautiful, successful, wealthy, confident… none of these things mean that you can’t also be kind and approachable and charming. And hell, I’m not any of those things and I still managed.

      But, if a friend was telling me that she’s intimidating and she’s a little bummed about it, I wouldn’t correct her. I would just tell her that a man intimidated by a successful woman doesn’t deserve her. Which is also true.

    • Sarah

      I know that men and women alike are intimidated by me. They have told me, on several occasions. Mostly because of my intelligence, but for other reasons as well.

      I had one teacher who actually shook in fear as my 12-year old self confronted her about why I got a low mark. She changed the mark.

      As a female engineering student, I have witnessed first hand the inability of some men to handle an intelligent, successful female. They only represent a small handful of men, but they are vocal and offensive. They cope by making sexist and belittling comments, by insulting me and by trying to prove that they are better than me. I can’t wait until I am running my own engineering firm so I can show those men what a REALLY intelligent, REALLY successful person looks like. In the end, all they do is make me work harder to prove myself.

      Anyways, I’m not saying I’m a nice person – though my fiancé seems to think I’m pretty great. If I were single – and I am often surprised to find I am not – it probably wouldn’t be so much because of the intimidation, but more because I’m really not all that pleasant to be with. But it is perfectly legitimate for some people to believe they intimidate others. Because sometimes? It’s true.