Does Anyone Actually Keep Their Bra On During Sex?

You know, as I sit at home watching ‘Sex and the City’ reruns on TBS, eating yodels, there are a lot of lies I can tell myself. I can tell myself that this is some sort of cool, “New York” experience, the yodels and the reruns, and that I’m just like Carrie Bradshaw. I can pretend that Carrie Bradshaw’s New York was kind of realistic! I can tell myself that this is a better use of my time than anything else. I can pretend a lot of things.

But I cannot pretend that, in the course of sleeping with many, many men, who were presumably somewhat sexually experienced, not one of them ever sat down with Carrie Bradshaw and said “honey? Why do you always keep your bra on during sex? Do you have… an issue?” By issue they mean “third nipple.” And then Carrie could have cried, because, yes, she did.

I just think that was a conversation that needed to happen, at least once. Because in real life, surely that conversation would happen. Unless! Unless this is something people do. Does anyone actually keep their bra on during sex? If so, why? We’re looking for something that isn’t “a third nipple.”

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    • Eileen


      But, then, I try in every possible way to be absolutely nothing like Carrie Bradshaw, so it might actually be something people do who do not share my goal of being Carrie’s antithesis.

      • Colleen

        I don’t either, and I want to be a part of this Carrie Antithesis Club!!!!

      • Eileen

        Awesome, welcome! Our main rule is that we spend more on rent than on shoes. We also try to treat men like human beings rather than ATMs attached to vibrators, although we admit that that can be difficult.

      • Colleen (different than first poster)

        Oh, Eileen, you are so funny!

    • Amy

      I always assumed it was because SJP didn’t want to be topless on the show. But giving too much thought to whether an actual woman living in NYC lives her life at all similarly to Carrie (or any of the other ladies) will only result in a migraine. :)

    • Tobi

      Yeah, I always thought it was so SJP wasn’t naked on TV. I never thought of it as her character’s choice.

      • Jennifer Wright

        That’s obviously true. But it still didn’t fit in the context of the show. It wasn’t like, okay, this is a TV dimension where EVERYONE wears a bra during sex. Samantha was naked pretty much every episode. Charlotte got naked. So did Miranda. It still seemed bizarre that in this world – a world where, based on the other three characters, most women got naked for sex – no man ever commented on Carrie’s lack of nudity. I’m just saying there should have been a two sentence thing once that accounted for it. A little throway “I keep my bra on because I have tons of body issues” thing to make it make sense.

      • Tobi

        There are a couple of times that it did occur to me, seeing as Carrie had the only set of boobs I hadn’t seen. I guess I had just written it off in my head as an “actor thing.”

        As for real life, I have had sex with my bra on. It’s not a normal thing, as I’m usually nude, but sometimes it can go along with a fun time (not necessarily role-playing). Sometimes it’s not even a regular bra, but just sexy lingerie that provides peek-a-boo coverage.

    • Beth

      Bra and thong, at boyfriend’s request! Some coverage “in the right places” turns him on.

      • Jennifer Wright

        I am sorry for prying, but how does the thong work? Do you just sort of yank it over to the side? Or does it come off before… this conversation is making me blush on the internet.

      • teenie

        yanked to the side! you can do that with seksy full underpants too. i’ve had lots of guys want/do that.

    • Thaler

      I once dated a guy who was so into the bottom half I had to undress my own top half while he was down there. He would’ve eventually noticed if I’d kept the bra on every time, but it would have taken him awhile.

    • Colleen

      I’ve been told, by men & women alike, that I have the best breasts on the planet (and they are all natural), so the bra ALWAYS comes off. The men I have dated have been captivated by my breasts, so it would be very strange to keep my bra on.

    • Lulu

      I always assumed it was SJP’s choice, since she seemed to be the most powerful.

      As for me, I sometimes can’t “fully enjoy myself” if I have anything on, even socks, so it’s definitely no. I understand that some people like to keep certain things on, but if one always leaves their bra on without one lapse ever, then they’re closing half the playground off, right? Even when I’ve been mostly dressed because of urgency or location, the bra still nearly always ends up undone or pushed up or down for access (by him or me).

    • Kayla

      Well, when you look like a foot, maybe it’s for the best to keep additional parts of your body covered.

      • Tiffany


    • Justin

      Bras are just fine. They have a “we’re moving too fast to take all our clothes off” property to them, they are a bit of variety, and bras are closely associated with the female sex. Models are more often seen wearing a bra and underwear. Minimal clothes can often be sexier than full nudity for this reason.

      I imagine the equivalent for men would be wearing jeans and a white hanes undershirt only. And then getting your shirt dirty when you check your girlfriend’s oil. At least that’s what my girlfriend liked, probably because it is something only men do. :)

    • Natalie

      It was written into her contract that she wouldn’t do nudity – but there are lots of scenes where she is topless under a sheet, under a guy, etc. We are supposed to think she’s topless, even though she isn’t. She also is naked in some steam room scenes. So I don’t think we can say that Carrie has some weird phobia.

      But I think that some women might keep their bra on if they are really big-chested, as it could be more comfortable. Maybe?

    • Hall

      When I leave my bra on I leave it on for two reasons. 1- I’ve been breastfeeding my son & I’m terrified of leaking during sex. Don’t know if it will happen, but it’s a huge turn-off for me. 2- I have large breasts & sometimes they just move too much so at times it is more comfortable. My honey understands why I do it so it’s not an issue. If he wants it off he can do it himself.

    • rox

      I dont know, I think tis more for variety’s sake. Plus, if you have a gorgeous set of lingerie, isnt it fun to keep some of it on?
      I dont understand people who need to be completely naked all the time. If youve been with the same person for a while, its nice to do something different.

    • Krysta

      I think it’s kinda hot. :3

    • Paddy Lake

      I love seeing and feeling a woman in her bra! I never understand why the sexiest piece of clothing has to be taken off for sex. Keep it on… it’s hot!