• Mon, Mar 14 2011

Why You Should Date An Older Man

I was picking up my boyfriend from the nursing home and he mumbled, spittle and applesauce flying “why don’t you do a piece on how great it is for you lovely young ladies to date nice older men?” At least, I think that’s what he said. It’s hard to tell sometimes, what with the dentures. Anyhow, here’s some input from lovely young ladies (names changed to protect all identities) who are dating older men:

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  • G

    I dated a guy 14 yrs my senior. It was great. Ended for reasons other than age but it was great while it lasted. And everything these women are saying is true. Although I’d like to temper it with a statement that men always act like boys sometimes, and older men are no different. They love their toys (no I did not mean it like that).

    • michelle

      well i agree i dated an older man and it didnt las too long cause he thought i was childish but it wasnt true at the time and now i think i will be off with someone else peace out see u lter

  • Lorraine

    Amen, sisters! I’m dating a man 15 years my senior and it is the first honest, equal relationship I’ve ever been in. We’re both divorced so we know there have been other people in the past and neither one of us feels threatened by that. He has his act together, his career on track and his house paid off! Not to mention he cooks AND cleans because he was single for so long.

  • Rosebud

    While in college, I dated a guy 7 yrs my senior and it was ( so far) one of the best relationships I have been in. All the reasons above are true. I would like to point out that all of my guy friends absolutely hated him. They were not able to handle having an older guy around.

    Also… I hate men who love video games. My ex bf did not watch sports ( I was the one who wanted to go to a baseball game) nor play video games. It was like heaven.

  • Ima

    All the points above are true. Older men rule! The ideal age gap is at least 15 years older than me. Boys my age always think I’m so smart, so an older man who knows more than I do is a welcome challenge. The conversation that flows, (& I wonder where the time went), as compared to awkward silences and/or rants about school, friends, parents, siblings, cars, sport, etc.
    This is not to say older men never get it wrong.

  • K

    I don’t know about this – I dated older men almost exclusively for a long time and none of the relationships ever lasted. It always seemed like the guys were most interested in my age (as a sort of trophy, I guess) and least interested in a lasting partnership. You can’t make a blanket statement saying that “all young guys are uncultured tools” because there are a heck of a lot of older men who are also uncultured tools. That said, I didn’t have a really meaningful relationship until I started dating someone 7 years younger than I am, and we’ve been together 4 years and getting married this fall. Yes, he loves video games, but he hates sports, and I can deal with Halo much easier than I can the Super Bowl.

  • ellie

    I’ve never understood how one goes about dating an older man; at what age, for example, does it become acceptable to date at a 10 year+ age gap- 20? 25?
    Also how does one meet a man with that kind of age gap? Through work? At weddings? I am so curious!

    • Ashley Cardiff

      it depends on the individuals involved right? but if i had to, i’d say generally that the difference between a 25 year old and a 35 year old is much, much less than between a 25 year old and, say, a 20 year old, if that makes sense.

    • Jennifer Wright

      I agree with Ashley, though I think it’s mostly just being out in the world and working lends itself to very different conversation than being in school. I think work also means that you develop friendships with people based on your interests, not your ages – so it’s not unreasonable that a 25 year old would be friends with a 35 year old who’d want to set you up with one of their friends.

    • Paige

      Thank you! I dont either. I have been that route, and it seems women who date older men may not have felt enough love from their own father, and they only think older men are “sophisticated.” This isnt always the case…some women are just confused and misguided.

    • bkl

      I think it’s OK once you are in your 20s. I had two relationships with much older men; one I met at my place of worship & the other while in graduate school. Don’t regret them at all, but in fact, I ended up marrying someone 3 years younger.

  • Ashley Cardiff

    also. this “cindy” has clearly made awesome life choices. he sounds like a winner. (not sarcasm)

  • Paige

    This would be great if….
    at 16 years old, I dated and had relations with a 35 year old man.
    And I am still scarred.

    • bkl

      You were much too young to date someone that age. He is a pedophile. If you are really suffering, you should try to talk with a counselor.

  • MB

    Agreed!
    Of course not ALL older men rock, but if you choose wisely, you’ll be pleasantly surprised.

  • Emma

    I’m dating an older guy and I think they just have more respect for women. It also opens my eyes when I see things from their perspective. I think the most important thing to consider when you date an older guy is whether or not you’re comfortable with it. If you’re always going to wonder what other people think, you’re not going to be happy in this relationship.

  • Elle

    Currently dating a guy 19 years older than me. Despite the backlash from friends and family, things have never been better.

  • skstroup

    I am so glad to see this. I am currently dating a man 40 years my senior and I will never go back. Ever since I can remember I have had a thing for much much older men. For me, I do not see that much difference between men of different ages, it is the physical attraction that gets me initially to older men. The maturity thing is great too.

  • skstroup

    To be frank though, I do not see anything under 10 years difference to be much older. Unless that ten years was maybe 16 and 26.

  • Rachel

    I’m 23 and engaged to an amazing man whose 36. The biggest problem in our relationship is that our friends, family and acquaintances have the problem with our age difference. In the beginning it really bothered me, but now I just laugh.

  • casey

    I have met and found a great guy who is 8 years my senior. I am 21 and hes 29. At first I felt like I did not want to date him but I decided to go for it. I am glad I did because he’s the sweetest angel I have ever met. I do believe guys who are older than you can be great to date and are really mature and always want to please and treat you like their queen, because my boyfriend always does the same to me.

    • Nat

      Yup! And you won’t have to deal with him “liking” every other girl’s pictures on Facebook. lol. They have better things to do with their time.

  • Christine

    Nowadays I m dating with 37 years old man-my boss (I’m 22). I think I’m on my phase of attraction to him strongly esp his funny and caring behaviours. We do go to lunch during break and he invited me to his home for glass of wine and movie. I went bit drunk and we slept. I am afraid we were to quick. I think I suppose to expect sex once he invite me to his home and refuse ???. And I still fancy him but now really confusing wether he’s appropriate for me or not. This relationship was after split up from my ex after 5 years relationship (totally fed up from same age guys) and I was in instable psycology. I am now so confused wether I should continue this relationship … I need someone who can respect and care me.

  • Winnie

    Dating a guy 15yrs my senior i am 25yrs. He is serious about da relationship but sometimes i get worried