7 Ways To Know You’re Being Passive Aggressive

Yesterday, we posted a note that was written by perhaps one of the most passive-aggressive people ever. But just to be sure the point is driven home, we want to make sure that you’re able to recognize the signs of passive aggression, and do something about them…like, I don’t know…have a direct, productive conversation.

Here is a short list to that effect:

  1. You regularly bitch about unnamed individuals — i.e., “SOMEONE” — on your Facebook or Twitter.
  2. You’re upset about something a friend said or did, so you curtly tell her you’re busy every time she tries to make plans.
  3. You leave anonymous comments on websites, anywhere, anytime. It’s the modern-day unsigned note.
  4. You clean the house while quietly simmering instead of telling your partner/roommate that they aren’t doing their share of household chores.
  5. You dislike the demands your boss or co-worker is making on your time, so you ignore her emails or take several hours to reply.
  6. You couch dissenting opinions, anger or sadness in smiley faces, baby voices or ending your comment with a question?
  7. You disagree with someone’s opinion, but rather than engage directly in a spirited debate, you blog about it days later.
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    • E.D.

      I’ll own up to #5, but only with my cow-orkers. Sometimes I have to wait a few hours so I don’t go ballistic at all of the stupid questions.

    • MelbaToast

      I have a colleague who is the queen of the condescending baby voice. So high-pitched! Delivered with a tight-lipped smile! And how am I currently coping with it? By complaining anonymously about her on a website that she doesn’t read.

    • Leah

      I used to have a roommate who always used to move my shoes (from by the door to my room). I assumed it was because she didn’t think my shoes should go by the door, but was unable to question me about it. Did I step up and ask her why she always moved my shoes? No. I just kept putting them back by the door. Went on for 5 months. I think we should win some sort of passive-agressive award.