Why Rich People Are Fun!

Jamie mentioned in the comments on this post about sugar daddies that she hates most rich people. That struck us – and Eileen – as an unfair generalization, because we really believe that any kind of bigotry and discrimination against a class of people is wrong. We decided it was worth touching on the topic. Also, I threatened to go home and use all of my bandage dresses to stop up the big sad hole that had been ripped in my heart by all the hatred, so Ashley helped me make this picture of a smiling sailboat. It seemed like a shame to let that go to waste. His name is Schooner! So. How are rich people the funnest, with their anthropomorphic sailboats and glamour? This is how:

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    • Jamie Peck


      • Jennifer Wright

        Tiger race you to the finish line!

    • Eileen

      Rich people are awesome because they don’t talk or worry about money. I don’t like to talk or worry about money because it reminds me that I don’t have much and that makes me sad. Rich people just live their lives and do whatever they want, and if they want you to do expensive things with them, they’ll pay for it themselves because they’d rather have time doing fun things with you than money. Or if they think you should read a book they’ll buy you a copy and give it to you instead of just telling you you should read it.

      Hmm. This is a personality type more than it is an economic type. But it’s a personality type that’s a lot easier to sustain if you’re rich.

    • ellie

      I don’t hate rich people but to be fair to Jamie, this isn’t really a detailed socioeconomic article on them. Obviously. Because thegloss isn’t a socioeconomic journal. But even if luxury goods are kinda fun (I will take one pet tiger please, gift wrapping optional), rich people are generally able to afford them thanks to the hard work of others, such as factory workers, who earn low wages which drive executive profits sky high. And although they do donate very generously -and publicly- to good causes, (like tiger sanctuaries!) those donations would not be so necessary if profit from labour was shared evenly throughout the global supply chain.

      And then there’s the point that money=power so rich people are maintaining the system by holding more sway with politicians than their less wealthy constituents.

      So I don’t hate rich people, but I do hate the process by which they become rich and stay rich. (TL:DR?)

      • porkchop

        Yeah. Rich people are flawed, like everyone else. Their flaw is that they think they deserve to be rich.

    • KM

      All you have to do is find a cool/nice rich person, because they tend to hang out with other cool/nice rich people! Then they’ll let you babysit their tigers.

    • Lisa

      Wait, why do you hate farmers? :(

      • Lindsay Cross

        Um… I second this question. You realize that you have a bestie who lives in INDIANA right? If you really hate farmers Jen, you hate my grandparents. Really Jen… Gigi and Papa… their hearts are broken.

      • Eileen

        I’m sure Jen only hates farmers because of the government subsidies they get, right? That cause severe market distortion and help ensure that farmers in developing countries can never make a decent living because the international price of food is artificially low and their governments don’t do agricultural subsidies? (see: the Fanjul brothers and the Caribbean sugar market – not to mention the Everglades)

        Not that I hate farmers. I actually know very few farmers, and the ones I do know are generally nice people. But you can come up with a reason to hate almost any group of people if you try!

      • Jennifer Wright

        Oh, Lindsay, Lisa, I’ve never even met a farmer! They just seemed like an absurd group of people to hate! Like, legitimately, the craziest group you could possibly generalize about in a negative fashion!

      • Jennifer Wright


      • Eileen

        (I know! They’re all busy…like…farming. It’s horrible! And they’re convinced we want farm products, which are the worst. I hate stuff that’s been farmed. Except coffee ice cream.)