Real Talk: The Most Awesome/Horrible Times We’ve Had Sex Outside

Ah, the great outdoors! Besides being a delightful John Candy movie, it’s also a popular (if not controversial) place for sexual intercourse. For today’s Real Talk, we asked a bunch of men and women about times they had sex outside and if it was awesome/horrible. Guess what? It’s both!

Most of those asked have done it (at least once) but no one takes it too seriously. Tales of “poison oak vagina,” IHOP parking lots and rattlesnakes ahead…

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    • Lauren

      In high school or college, I had sex in my boyfriends backyard after weeks of him begging. We never had sex in a bed unless he was visiting me at college. It was usually in the car. But one day I finally gave in. Then we had 3 minute of the most boring and dirty (and not in the good way) sex ever. Never again.

    • Fabel

      In high school, I went to my local park (at nighttime) with this dude who was a friend of my junior prom date. We had sex on the playground equipment– those big, colorful things with the stairs and slides attached? Not sure what to call it! But yeah, I got all sorts of bruises from the plastic-coated wire mesh platform.

    • porkchop

      These are excellent stories, especially because I’m now reflecting on whether “Virgin Suicides style” should mean on a high school football field, or on a roof (or just anywhere in Grosse Point)…

    • Jinx

      I was camping with my boyfriend and we got caught in a thunderstorm so we decided to pass the time by having sex in our tent. It was incredible.

    • Lexie

      Sex on a pyramid. As awkward as it sounds. No fear of parents, but the Egyptian military patrolling the area is a libido-killer. I’m just sayin’.

    • Kelly

      On the beach!!!!!!!!! Ooooh! On the beach. Encore!

    • MM

      I got lucky on Janiculum Hill in Rome. We were under this cliffside and while she swore that nobody above could see us, to this day I still have my doubts.

      But I regret nothing! She was a babe.

    • Ashley

      Oh my god, whenever the topic of outdoor sex comes up I feel like my entire high school sex life is up for grabs. I once had a relationship where in the middle of weekday afternoons we would surreptitiously lug a camping bag (how do you surreptitiously lug a camping bag, oh by the way?) to this forest area near my house to have sex and smoke cigarettes. This “forest area” was also a popular dog-walking spot. My dad walked my dog there every day.
      We were idiots.

      I have a friend, however, who really takes the cake for awesome-sex-having-in-weird-places. It’s not outdoors, so maybe this is the wrong conversation for it. But I’m going to share anyways because it is so awesome.
      Solitary confinement cell at Alcatraz.
      Boom.

    • Nora

      I lost my virginity, very recently, in a park. It was late and dark and decently planned because we knew neither one of our houses would ever be empty. We had tried in the car a few times, unsuccessfully, because there’s just something about my mom’s station wagon that doesn’t make it easy to go for it. The park was empty and had lots of trees that separated us from the road, but the disgusting amount of grass that ended up all over me(because we got too enthusiastic and rolled off the blanket) and the mosquito bites in unmentionable and un-itchable places were not very pleasant. Although those things didn’t bother me until well afterwards. There were deer very nearby, but my boyfriend insists that they weren’t watching me. Overall, it was enjoyable and I wouldn’t change it for anything and I’ll probably have sex outside again. I like the roof idea and the tent idea.