• Wed, Aug 24 2011

How To Lie About Your Age More Effectively

People! Always lying! Especially about their age. The New York Post reports:

“Getting old is serious business,” says Patrice Evans, a 35-year-old single writer from Brooklyn. “At the heart of it, your mortality is ticking in your ear.”

What I have absorbed from this is “lie about your age and you can outrun death.” Or get beer before you are legally allowed to! Here are some ways to lie about your age in a fanstastic fashion.

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  • Eileen

    If you are an Asian woman between the ages of 15 and, say, 40, you can claim you are any age between 15 and 40 and people will believe you, generally without even a blink.

    Alternatively, you’re going to have to do your research (ala Jenna Maroney that one time she wanted to convince Jack that she was 29 and assured him that her prom song was performed by Boyz II Men). Also, don’t forget to edit any important details on your Facebook page, as did my high school study hall teacher whose profile now claims that he finished his undergraduate degree a year after I finished high school.

    • Kim

      As an Asian woman between 15 and 40 with several friends of same demographic, I’m going to have to agree. At best, you get to say you’re 20 when you’re really on the brink of a mid-life crisis. At worst, it’s fairly annoying when you have to constantly remind people that you go to college, not middle school.

  • LaLa

    I think I’m gonna go with the “be totally crazy” option. It sounds like the most fun.

  • John

    IM 20 , and this girl i was dating for three months is 13 and were in love it may sound crazy but i love my baby <333

    • Lewis

      Yo dude can you not go to jail for that crazy stuff?