Real Talk: Men Tell Us If They Like Fake Breasts

After our poll on plastic surgery yesterday, we thought “but wouldn’t it be weird to be all breast-squeezing and such and then come upon… whatever fake breasts feel like? Bags of sand, maybe? That must be so weird!” We have a hard time describing “foreplay.” But there seem like there are women who want to make a point out of how their breasts are real, so we asked male friends whether or not encountering fake breasts would bother them. Also, whether they feel like bags of sand.

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    • Paul Anderson

      Well some may like it, but for me – I don’t like much of a women having those big boobs. It sometimes irritates me – but there is nothing I can do with it. Cosmetology License industry has it all like this .

    • M

      I want to punch “Henry” in the face.

      • ella

        So sad ..what you talking about. The biggest dilemma in the world. Stupid waste of time. nothing more you cant talk about…

    • rita

      all the boobs in the pictures just reminded me of how tiny mine are.

      • Donna

        itty bitty titty commitee ftw :)

    • Lainey

      I’d love to know what Henry looks like! Guys who talk about “fat” women, usually don’t look all that hot.

    • August S.

      Henry & Helen should totally hook-up. The hate-sex would be EPIC. Ashley & Jennifer, make this happen!!

    • J.

      Wow. Can you interview some non-douches, please? (Dan seems okay, though.)

      Incidentally, I love that Henry can’t spell. Or insists on pluralizing inappropriately.

    • Alanna

      I have lost even more faith in humanity after reading this, even though I totally knew where it was going. Me and my A cups are going to sit in a corner now.

    • Eileen

      Didn’t you already do this question like a year ago?

    • Tony

      Looking at some enormous fake boobs can be great; however, only real will do when it comes to touching them.

      I guess in other words, it doesn’t matter unless I’m touching them. If I am, fake ones feel pretty terrible.

    • Mike

      I’m a guy and I love breasts of all sizes, as long as they’re NATURAL. I have a particular affinity for small breasts, even though I had a girlfriend once with natural H cups. Small and perky are wonderful. It hurts me every time I hear a woman being critical of her breasts (which I’d love to enjoy) just because she feels insecure about their size.

    • Isaac

      In the epic words of Master Yoda “size matters not.” Most guys are not actually fixated on breasts and we couldn’t necessarily tell cup size in and of itself. What guys are looking for is proportionality, a petite athletic girl with A or B cups looks pretty good to us; likewise, girls who are relatively fit to average seem to look great in B or C. As you get more chesty on average and smaller frames, the individuals begins to look more “top heavy” which isn’t necessarily all that attractive. Allow me to reiterate that the average guy is really just happy that you have a proportional bust. That being said, I wholeheartedly support the strides made in breast augmentation because it has eased the psychological suffering of many breast cancer survivors, and that is to be commended.

    • Alma

      In my younger years, I went from A cup to a B cup. Then I found a man who knew how to “play” with my breasts. In fact, he played with them to the point that I went to a C cup and now I’m a D cup. I am 51 years old and my breasts are perky, don’t sag, and actually start kinda from underneath my arms some. My boyfriend always has been a breast man and he had been with women with fake breasts. He said he got turned off when the women would lay on their sides and you could see “wrinkles”, or when he would grab, maybe a little to hard, would leave indentations. He said that was a major turn off. Then I came along and now he appreciates the woman with natural breasts, and even tho mine have “grown”, he said that because of his love for me, size really wouldn’t have mattered.

    • Ablateef


    • John

      If you can touch em…they’re real!

    • S.

      Hey Gloss,
      Can you do a feature on men who like small boobs?

      Or maybe men who like things that are not the things we’re all told we’re supposed to have?

      • Fabel

        I’m actually surprised they found so many that seem to be tit men? The dudes I know are all about the ass.

        But seriously, I don’t think guys are as “into” big breasts as women seem to think and/or are told. Enormity is always impressive, but I think round-ness, symmetry & perkiness are more important.

    • Meggy

      A lot of ladies seemed kind of depressed by the imagery and commentary in this article, so I feel like this needs to be said.

      Here’s how you handle this article as a small-breasted woman: You read the article, sit back in your chair, take a drink of whatever you might currently be cradling (wine? juice? breast milk?) and think, “Well, that’s a sorry lot that judges women by their breast size.”

      Having read this, my AA-cups and I are going to go have great sex with a great guy who loves me for who I am, regardless of how large any part of me is or ever will be.

      • S.

        Amazing that we all forget this perspective which, really, makes far more sense.

        Thank you, Meggy.

      • adel

        hi dear friend i ll be one who want u just because of you see you

      • John

        Looks are not everything but they will help you stay interested in each other over the years. My exwife was 140 pounds when we married. She was over 400 pounds and our marriage went down hill. I am not saying she needed to stay small either after 2 kids. It is the same with breast. To little to look at and play with can be a problem. I dated a lady with a B cup and she asked why I did not play with her breast like others she had been with. It is hard to say what breast.

      • Missy

        I like you lol this is a really good comment. Society has put in our heads what the perfect breasts should look like. I’m pretty sure Eve didn’t obsess the way we do in this day and age. If yur man likes the way you look then I don’t see a problem, if he doesn’t then maybe you’re with the wrong guy. It all boils down to self esteem and fitting in. If you have horrid self esteem and you want men to look at you then this is a great way to do it. A person in a stable successful relationship will not normally think about implants. Someone who is unhappy or unfulfilled may look into it. Honestly I have thought about it in the past but it was never because of me, it was always because I was comparing myself with others. Women need to get past all that and love themselves. There is nothing more sexy then confidence. ;)

    • Noisette

      Why are most of the women in this gallery drug-addicted singers or porn stars? I think whoever put this gallery together has a weird agenda about plastic surgery. There are plenty of women in Hollywood who’ve had plastic surgery and breast implants (i.e. Demi Moore) who don’t look so dumb and slutty.

    • Venus in Furs

      Why would you promote such a banal and sophomoric statement as Henry’s?

    • Rob

      Big fake boobs are great. perky little boobs are great. my favorite boobs are the next ones.

    • Nombert

      It is likely that many of the men commenting here are young, and have experience only with youngish women. I am a much older guy and just want to chime in here to point out that as women age their breasts become telling statements of that aging and that no one — repeat, no one — finds this attractive. The woman may remain beautiful in every other way, and the most wonderful, loving person, and the guy may love her more than ever regardless of the condition of her breasts. But her breasts are definitely not going to be as attractive as they used to be — unless she has implants. With implants she can become more attractive than she ever was before. Just think about that for a second: MORE ATTRACTIVE THAN SHE EVER WAS BEFORE…and she’s way over 40, over 50, even over 60, or yes, over 70! Breast implants enable a woman to retain benefits of youthfulness by years, even decades. So the great majority of women “need” or anyway “will want” implants sooner or later. And implant technology has improved spectacularly. I assure you they do not feel like bags of sand: They feel normal. Implants are a wonderful, wonderful thing. I don’t see anyone here saying they actually prefer implants over natural: Well let me be the first to state overtly that I do prefer implants over natural — and to inform you younger guys that ‘you will too,’ eventually. Oh sure if I had access to women 35 years younger than me, I might say: “Um, I’ll take natural,” but that’s not realistic. Realistically I am going to be only with a women closer to my age — and I definitely want her to have breast implants. And a face lift.

      • Chrisitna

        While I admire your honesty, I can’t help but feel that you are very shallow. Yeah I get it, young breasts are beautiful, old breasts, not so much, but for you to say that you want the woman you are with to have breast implants and a face lift just shows what you really value about someone. That is so sad, especially at your age, you would think you would know the better qualities to look for. I feel sorry for your next lady, I bet she dosen’t like your saggy ass and grey, wrinkled balls either. Maybe you should get them implanted and lifted. Just a thought.

      • Amy

        I’m so curious to know if you’d have a face-lift or liposuction or whatever a love interest deemed desirable? If your ideals go both ways, then by all means continue to be a shallow man but I’m going to take a wild guess this is a double standard of yours. Also, it’s not up to you what a woman does to her body, whether or not you “want” her to have implants.

      • Glidmokk

        Well, Chrisitna and Amy, guys of all ages do care about women’s looks. You may call this “shallow” and indeed I would not disagree: It is shallow, but that’s the way boys are: They like more attractive women more than they like less attractive women. This truth is hardwired into all men, and all men respond to this aspect of their mental makeup to some degree. Certainly some guys are “too” interested in looks, to the exclusion of all else, while other guys are – sensibly – more balanced in their view of this matter. But all guys care to some extent, and therefore all women care about their appearance to some extent if they want to do all they can to attract or retain a guy in their life. There is nothing wrong with this, is there? This is merely and simply the nature of humans, and globally so.

        And now, addressing this fact-of-life, comes science with ways to make appearances better for longer periods of our lives – and yes, that’s science that is available to men and women alike, as you rightly point out. There’s nothing wrong with that science, is there?

        Investment in these technologies of personal enhancement and preservation does not imply that ‘looks’ are all that one values about one’s lady (or gentleman), so please do not leap to that conclusion. Of course there are other important qualities exactly as you say Chrisitna, and as I took care to note in my original post.

        And of course both of you (Chrisitna and Amy) are correct that women too are extremely likely to prefer the better-looking guy over the “saggy-assed” one, and it will be the wise man indeed who keeps himself looking as good as he can, by undertaking appropriate implants and lifts: Yes, Amy, I will do that for my lady and am well along in the decisionmaking of exactly what I plan to do.

        So far, in my family, all the available money for cosmetic surgery is going for her work. I’ve so far been limited to the gains I can make at the gym, which have been considerable: I work hard at it! I’ll definitely be in the doctor’s office for cosmetic surgery at some point, and having seen the astounding results on my lady, I’m eager to benefit from cosmetic science as well — even as I continue to be the best guy I can be in all other ways, for her and our family.

        We consider cosmetic surgery to be a worthwhile investment in the maximization of the quality of our lives. And we both find it a thrill to look at each other and see a person who is not only wonderful in so many ways, but also better-looking than before. What’s wrong with that?

      • George

        What is so wrong with gracefully getting old? Now that is a beautiful woman to me.

      • Sk

        Yeah, women with implants are more attractive TO YOU. I’ve got large As/small Bs and at my size, they will not be sagging, thank you very much. Implants are for the superficial gals (and apparently guys).

    • michael

      I find women with fake breasts to be fake as well,Whereas those which are comfortable as a natural woman are more natural people .Thank for staying natural

    • DrD

      Some do and some don’t.

    • S.H.

      That gallery of pictures shows how pathetic plastic surgeons are outside of California. A good boob job looks natural. Silicon feels awesome. Water filled ones–not so much. Some of those women look like they have water filled balloons pasted to their chest.

      I am a woman in Nomberts category. Over sixty with a face lift and a boob job. Was always really attractive and wanted to stay looking like ME. –not my mother. Don’t flaunt them and don’t have the wind tunnel look. Most people don’t know how old I am and that I have had any work. When people find out the typical reaction is “are you shitting me?”

      No matter how old you get you still feel young inside. I found seeing bags under my eyes made me feel tired. I felt more energetic after the face lift because the mirror was not longer telling me I was someone I wasn’t. Boobs sag. You can’t pick them up and put them back where they were without adding implants. I didn’t want to be bigger. I just wanted my boobs back where they started out.

      I enjoy looking good for me–not for any guy. My husband of 20 years adores me because I am fun and honest–not for my boobs. I was not shallow before I got bought boobs and I am not shallow now. Have 4 graduate degrees and a life time of wisdom.

      Nombert gets it. The guys who say all boobs are good get it. The women who take their AAs and have hot sex get it.

      The people who are judgmental don’t get it and are exposing their lack of life experience.

    • rawr

      God some people..

      Don’t justify plastic surgery, it has no benefits unless your face was horribly scarred by burns or an animal attack and you can’t walk out in public without getting shunned by people. Even then, the fake shallow bitches go farther in life than an actual genuine person with a good personality.

      If you’re average looking, get some self esteem. Cheaper than paying to go under a knife, and probably because you paid to look fake you’re delusional when you try to justify why you did it.

      “I was not shallow before I got bought boobs and I am not shallow now. Have 4 graduate degrees and a life time of wisdom.”

      Yeah, that’s not shallow, who cares that you have 4 graduate degrees? It’s not shallow, it’s stupid that a person can’t feel happy about themselves because they’re in denial about getting old.

      • S.S. good info there

      • dblack

        Amen! Well said!

    • S. S. good info for women

    • Obama

      doesn’t it occur to anyone that women might be picky about men as well? Men are really unattractive.. their body parts look like old people. Women have hourglass figures. Seems to me if you want to have sex with someone plastic.. just buy a plastic doll. Yeeyee

    • Dude

      Sorry, but men want a woman, and that means breasts. We don’t want someone who has the physique of a boy. So if you have small breasts, you are indeed inferior to your larger breasted counterparts. Anything less than a C is much too small, and no amount of beauty in your face, attitude, or any other aspect of your personality can make up for it.

      • dblack

        Really??? 12 yearold boys have VAGINA’S???

      • SayWhat

        So essentially what you’re saying is, a woman with a gorgeous face, athletic body, tight booty and a-cup breasts is genetically inferior to a butter-face, muffin-top, flabby butt woman with DDD breasts? Congratulations, enjoy the uggos. Now go shoot yourself.

    • Guy

      I don’t think women should obsess with it, but I have to admit I’d like tasteful implants in a woman. Personality would always come first, so I’d never chose a witchy woman no matter the perfection of her boobs. However if two women were equally nice personalitywise I’d prefer the one with silicone implants.

    • Robert

      Fake boobs will always be ugly and feel like shit. No idea why people are so unhappy with themselves they would turn to becoming fake to feel better about themselves and look disgusting. No woman I have ever seen looked good with fake breasts. Its unnatural and shouldn’t happen.

      You are going for the wrong guys if you need a boob job. You are thinking the wrong way if you need a boob job. A true and real good and great guy will love you for who you are. No matter what. Fake boobs are not the answer and its becoming a disgusting trend in the world in all sports and life settings. It needs to stop.