Gallery: Lindsay Lohan’s Worst Tans & Bronzer Abuses

Yesterday, Lindsay Lohan went to court. Also yesterday, Lindsay Lohan left court. In handcuffs. The former actress was taken into custody for missing nine (count em, nine) of her scheduled community service obligations. This seems like a perfect opportunity for Lohan to publically bitch about how unfair people are being to her because she’s famous, how’s she’s doing fine, totally not doing drugs and those weren’t her pants. Consequently, it’s an even better opportunity for Dina Lohan to whine ad nauseam about the media’s treatment of “[her] child.” And Ali Lohan is off somewhere, too, but no one recognizes her.

Anyway, this isn’t a law blog so we’re not going to delve any deeper into Lohan’s legal troubles (we are also lazy). This is a fashion and beauty blog, though, so we are going to address her bronzer problems. Lohan appeared in court with a pretty intense attempt at contouring but at least she didn’t write “fuck u” on her nails this time, or something similarly infantile. What were you thinking, Lohan?

…If this gallery is to be believed, Linsday Lohan is never thinking. Only bronzing.

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    • Ninargh

      All over orange. And a GRUMPY Lohan.

    • stephanie

      It’s because shes covered in head to toe freckles! She must be insecure about them. Poor Lilo.

      • MM

        But the freckles are adorable! Especially on redheads (which I believe she is naturally).

    • Aj

      If you go from Slide 1 to Slide 9 it looks like one of those Michael Jackson morphs.

    • Nicole O.

      I honestly hope that she gets it together before it’s too late. The way her life is, she’ll either end up in jail or she’ll be dead. So sad.

    • Nancy

      I read somewhere that her cheek bones were just bruised this week. She finally got some much needed dental work a few days before her court appearance.

      • Ella

        There’s no dental work known to man that can take the form of perfectly symmetrical bronze-colored gashes on either side of the face, immediately under the cheek bone. It’s classic a classic case of contouring gone wrong.

    • Kari

      What’s with the “trout pout”??

    • SometimesElla

      Alternate title could have been – Times When Lindsay Lohan Looked Most Like Dina

    • Ella

      Orange or not, she looks cute as a button in the first pic, before the cosmetic procedures and the trout pout. I miss the red hair. I miss the red hair.

      • SometimesElla

        Agreed. She was quite adorable back then.

    • Riona

      the second one OH GOD.

    • ohmy

      She should be the poster child in the fight against drugs! These pictures would be enough to scare anyone off drugs! But than considering the gene pool she came from it was inevitable! The apple doesnt fall far from the tree. So sad!