Real Talk: What Happened When We Met Our Significant Other’s Parents

Thanksgiving is coming. Are you ready to deal with your significant other’s family? When you meet your significant other’s family, you win or you die. Just saying!

Here is a story about the first time I met a significant other’s parents. Not to spoil anything for you, but I did not win. Here are some other stories:

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    • Roxana Rusowsky

      loved the Game of Thrones reference

    • Chloe

      Question: I’m trying to figure out how to go about meeting my SO’s parents for the first time. They’re both deeply-conservative, fundamentalist baptists and think he, at 24, is still both a virgin and a practicing christian. And, well, he’s not. Meanwhile, I’m a sex-posi feminist who was raised by a single, queer, U.U. mom and have NO IDEA how to relate to them, especially since they already pretty roundly disapprove of my existence. Unless he wants to be disowned, he can’t really let on how liberal he and I are, so I need to know how to get them to at least tolerate me without completely going against my beliefs. Any ideas?

      • b3v

        oooh boy. having been around some fundamentalist baptists in my time all I can say is…good luck! Try to ease into it…no hinting that you two have ever been alone in an apartment for starters…you know…be vague…but mostly, see if you and your bf can agree on how to behave. Does he talk to them all the time? Need their approval? If not, it might all be a bit easier… :S

      • Amie

        Well, given that your boy has decided it’s worth hiding his personality and beliefs from his parents apparently into perpetuity, you have a choice. You can either go along with his lies or inadvertently blow the whistle by being truthful. Fact is the truth that you were raised by a “single, queer, UU Mom” is automatically going to set the judgmental ball rolling. How are you going to cover that up — with some elaborate lie about your parental origins and upbringing? So… the real question is — how good of an actress and liar are you? If you’re not that good, don’t meet them. If you are that good, consider going into acting for a career.

      • Goldie

        Don’t meet them. It is not your responsibility to out his liberal lifestyle to his parents or lie about who you are.

        Until he’s adult enough to be honest with them or your relationship is serious enough that it’s inevitable (marriage, long term cohabitation, children, etc.) just don’t fucking do it.

        Seriously, that shit is not on you to figure out. My BF’s parents are the same types and them discovering that we live together was a total shit storm.

        You don’t deserve that kind of judgment and if your boyfriend cares about you he’ll do his best to protect you from it.

    • Colleen

      When my now-fiancee and I were just starting to see each other (it started out as a bedroom-only relationship and grew into something much more), he totally threw me under the bus with the mom-intro. I still haven’t met his father, I’ll meet him a week before the wedding. But I was supposed to meet him after work one night for sexy-time and then movie-time, but he called me and said he needed to run an errand first, if I wanted to meet him at his office I could follow him. Not having anything better to do, I agreed. He drove me into a neighborhood and when we arrived at a neat little duplex, I asked him WTF we were doing here and he said he was borrowing his mom’s vacuum.

      WHY was I a necessary accessory to this adventure? So I met his mom, she did mom things and gave him a bajillion cans of soup because he’d been sick, and since his hands were full I reached for the vacuum to carry it out for him. He stopped me and said “I got it, babe.” I gave him a look that plainly said “Did you just call me BABE in front of your MOTHER?” and got very quiet.

      She adores me. His whole family likes me better than him. I’ll never let him forget what a dick move that was, though.

      • Sadako

        What’s wrong with calling you “Babe” in front of his mother? Does she have a paralyzing fear of Dick King Smith characters?

      • Colleen

        No, it was just at the time I was under the impression that I was just at his place all the time for the sex. We were friends with benefits at the most and “babe” seemed like a relationship term. And then suddenly I’m meeting his mother?

    • Eagle Eye

      Ugh – so my bf has the worst story when he finally met my parents -

      He had been traveling through Asia for a couple of months when he decided to come back to the States early. I was visiting with my parents on the West Coast at the time and he figured that he’d stop on by – meet my family and then we’d fly back tot he East Coast together…

      1. Poor guy gets off of the plane after something like 12-14 hours flying and making connections only to be suddenly introduced to my father who came with me to pick him up from the airport.

      2. 1 week into his stay a bug he picked up in Asian blooms – cue me driving him to the hospital at 3am while he goes in and out of shock

      3. he spends the next week recovering by eating chicken soup in my sister’s bed (she’s away at college by this point)

      yeah…could’ve been better…

    • b3v

      Ok so, I’m 18, and Matt and I have JUST started dating (it’s been like, a month). I’m scheduled for knee surgery at a nearby hospital, and I know his mom is a nurse there…
      his mom was the on-duty “surgeon’s nurse” (that doesn’t translate very well, but you get the idea). So first time she laid eyes on me I was naked, under a hospital robe, trying my best not to cough because I knew if I did they wouldn’t anesthesize me and give me some kind of peridural instead. I was deadly scared of the peridural but not of choking it seems.
      anyways. she heard me cough, gave me a very professional speech about the dangers of what I wanted to do, then drugged me and probably saw more than I care to know during the operation.
      Then of course she had to assist me while I was waking up, and check that once I had regained feeling from the waist down, I could still go pee.
      So yeah, we broke the ice that day.

    • wnint

      Very cute article.I love it ,life is boring. My boyfriend think the same with me.he is almost 10years older than me .i met him via AgeGapLove’ a nice place for seeking age le ss love.which gives you a chance to make your life better and open opportunities for you to meet the attractive young girls and treat you like a king. Maybe you wanna check it out !!

      For those of you about to retire(my hubby will be within 5 years or so) i have been thinking about what we need to do before retiring and i will share it with you

    • Christina

      My college boyfriend played lacrosse and his entire family(parents, four siblings, and grandparents) was planning on coming to visit one weekend for his first game. They were supposed to get in the morning before the game, we’d go to brunch, do the mini dorm room tour, happy controlled introduction. However something happened, they got delayed and ending up getting there about five minutes before the game started. Now is also a good time to mention he comes from good, old fashioned, Texas Republican stock. I was with his roommate so his dad recognized him and came up. Second question: “So what’s your major?” “Environmental studies” “Oh. You’re one of Them”. And that is basically two years of awkward family gatherings in a nutshell, they came to watch him play at least twice a month so lots of family bonding time. Thankfully his mom loved me, I think we both had no idea what we were getting into, so it could’ve been worse. I think.

    • Donna

      Was that chocolate pie in the WASP mother story a reference to Minnie’s chocolate pie in the help? Awesome picture, if so.

    • PipPip

      The first time I met my ex’s mother was when they invited me to fly over and visit them in Belgium. One the first night his mother made a massive fuss at having to make vegetarian food for me (so I felt pretty bad already), and then proceeded to cry at the dinner table when I refused parmesan (which isn’t veggie) and accused me of lying to ruin her dinner.

      That was fun. Especially as both father and son were too scared to say anything and plate-gazed through the whole thing!

      • PipPip

        p.s. she spent the rest of the holiday trying to sneak anchovies into my food to ‘convert’ me back to a ‘proper’ diet.

      • Gracie

        I just wanted to point out that its not unreasonable of her to assume a vegetarian eats parmesan as most do eat dairy products as I do, and only certain varieties don’t such as veganism. That being said she sounds like a totally attention seeking drama queen. And what a bitch to try and convert you, I really people who don’t respect another’s lifestyle

      • PipPip

        Parmesan is a non-veggie cheese because it’s made with animal rennet. Ditto edam and gorgonzola…makes things a bit trickier! But you don’t expect non-vegetarians to know that. My main issue was that it was not an integral part of the meal, it was there as a condiment – would you salt someone else’s food?!