More Insights Into The World Of Dating Finance Guys

Recently, a letter written by an investment banker to a woman who turned him down for a second date circulated the internet. It was long-winded, utterly un-self-aware, condescending, delusional, and completely misguided, not to mention a waste of everyone’s time.

This got the internet world talking about the pitfalls of dating finance guys, and apparently, there are many. To bolster this conversation, Gawker has compiled stories from its readers on the topic, and so at the risk of compromising some of our pool of Real Talk participants, here’s our favorite story from the group.

This guy apparently sent his ex a quiz, with the intention of…well, it’s impossible to say. Patronizingly teaching her a lesson? Patronizingly attempting to garner real information about their break-up? Patronizingly encouraging her to be a better person? Or perhaps patronizingly suggesting that she take a look at herself and her life goals?

Why you were unhappy with us:
Are there things you do not like about me?
Are there things you do not like about us?
Are there things you don’t like about yourself when it comes to us?

Name as many things as you can you would change about. Again, you must list everything that bothers you.
1. me
suggestions: I interrupt you, I need to enunciate when I speak
2. us
3. yourself

Where do you want to be in?
6 months
1 year
5 years
10 years
20 years
50 years / retirement age

In Exercise A, you must cover any topics you bring up for previous periods

Exercise A
- List the reasons you were unhappy November 2007 – present
suggestions: Financial reasons, Emotional reasons, Our relationship related stuff, professional stuff
- List any things that made you happy November 2007 – present

List the reasons you are unhappy now:

List the reasons you are happy now:
__________________________

For the Exercise B it might make sense to break it into three tiers(OST):
An example for me:
Objective I want to be in better shape
- why should I bother? I want to have better health, I want to have better sex, I want to be more sexually attractive to women, I want to look and feel better about myself, I will be better at everything else if my health is in order, I will meet people by doing outdoorsy stuff
Strategies: I want to improve my 1. cardiovascular capabilities 2. flexibility 3. muscles 4. I want to do outdoorsy stuff this summer
Tactics/Action Items:
1. a. ride a bike for fun & to work
b. go on hikes
c. do yoga everyday, do a yoga class once a week
d. join a gym?????
2. a. do yoga everyday, do a yoga class once a week
3. a. join a gym??????
b. do yoga everyday, do a yoga class once a week
4. a. Do outdoorsy stuff with friends
b. ride a bike
c. go to the beach
d. fear getting sunburned less
e. book vacations and 3-day weekends

Exersice B
List all of the specific things you will do to improve:
1. Your physical health
2. Your emotional health

There are about six other stories, and they are worth a read (hint: at least one involves group sex).

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    • porkchop

      Wow! This was thrilling to read. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen such unvarnished fear before. I’m not saying that anyone deserves to put up with his s***, but that…bouquet of worsted wool and flop sweat that drifts off these words is so intoxicating and sad.

      It’s like…someone so enslaved by insecurity that you can’t even help them because they’ll just tear you up like a dog with his paw in a trap. Anyone who says Americans are shallow and simpleminded just doesn’t understand how DEEP our superficiality really is. You could die of this level of insecurity.