• Wed, Dec 14 2011

Real Talk: Women Tell Us If They’d Tell Their Boyfriend To Diet

men diet boyfriend

Given that yesterday we asked men whether or not they’d tell their girlfriend to diet and they said “maybe!” we decided to turn it around and ask women whether or not they are monsters. Would they tell their boyfriend to diet? Frankly, they’d probably just dump him.

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  • Chloe

    I have with past boyfriends because I was an asshole. My current guy weighs less than I do, though, and has the metabolism of a small rodent. So I’m distinctly less assholish these days.

  • Nancy

    Woah. I’m in a serious relationship, and his weight has gone up a down a little bit and it doesn’t change the way I look at him at ALL. But if he gained like 50 pounds, I would tell him to diet. Yes, tell him. If he ever gained that and said he wouldn’t diet and just kept gaining, THEN I might break up with him…. Are all those women in real realtionships…? Most of these women’s answers seem harsh…
    Danielle and Cara are after my own heart.

  • KeLynn

    It’s so hard to say. Frankly, it takes a LOT of weight gain/loss for me to notice. If I did notice, I’d probably be the sneaky person who suddenly cooked super healthy meals and started saying we should go for walks more, etc. But if it continued? I guess I’d *have* to say something, but it would sure be an awful and awkward conversation to have.

  • Fabel

    Pretty harsh! I probably wouldn’t SAY anything (except with my hands, by pinching) until about 15 lbs? Depending on how those 15 lbs looked, I guess? And I’d only be really concerned if HE didn’t seem concerned at all.

  • Lemona

    I guess none of slideshow women love the men they’re dating.

    If you love someone, you love them even when their appearance changes, and you love them through tough times, which can bring on weight gain.

    I love my boyfriend, so when he gained a significant amount of weight (due to eating away the stress from work ), I suggested a diet. Not because I wanted him to look better (although yeah, I prefer the slim version), but because I wanted him to be healthier and to quit panting whenever we did something athletic.

    • Rachel D.

      Yes. You say something BECAUSE you love him.

    • Lu

      Yeah, what I was wondering, too…it seems like the definition of ‘boyfriend’ in this survey is wider than I might have anticipated?

      If I care that little about someone that I’d dump him over simple weight gain, he’s -not- my boyfriend. He’s my booty call.

      BUT I definitely see the sense in the “I keep myself up, and so should he!” line of thought. Still, that’s something to be worked through together, if I care about him enough to actually call him a ‘boyfriend.’

  • eelizg23

    All this diet talk is getting to be really triggering for me. And most of the people on these “Real Talks” are making me lose my faith in humanity.

    • Ms. Pants

      I often wonder if the gals that run the site only know complete assholes.

  • Megs

    I had to hint for a number of months (like.. 6) with gentle reminders about his portions (he eats like a fucking PIG) and asking if he’d go to the gym with me before I eventually had to tell my boyfriend that I wasn’t feeling sexually attracted to him any more. That was the worst, definitely the hardest thing I’ve ever had to tell a boyfriend short of “I’m breaking up with you”.

    But I think the reason I felt empowered enough to say something was the fact that I put a lot of effort into the way I look and my health and had lost 30lbs myself with good diet and exercise, and I don’t feel like it’s too much to ask of my boyfriend who definitely needs to lose 30lbs himself, and he is 9 inches taller than me.

  • Avodah

    Soooo, what is the difference between men and women in the two “surveys”? It seems like both genders would dump their partner. Where are all the commenters from the other survey? –crickets chirping—

  • Patricia

    I wouldn’t say something like OH MY GOD YOU’RE SO FAT GO ON A FUCKING DIET OR I’LL DUMP YOUR SORRY FAT ASS but yeah, I would say something. Probably along the lines of “honey, gently step away from the pizza”. Kidding, I’d try to put it in a way I’d want to hear it. Because see, I would like my boyfriend to tell me.

    I really don’t think there’s anything wrong with telling someone – NICELY – that they’ve put on weight. And I’m not talking about passive agressivenss, I’m talking about honesty and manners combined.

    My current boyfriend isn’t super slim/athletic but he jogs and eats well, so who cares if he puts on a couple of pounds. It’s no biggie. But I’m guessing we’re talking about health hazardous weight gain, something that yes, could be bad for him, then hell yeah I would say it.