• Wed, Jan 18 2012

Some Of Your Concerns About My Tattoo Rant, Addressed

Yesterday’s post on tattoo etiquette sure was polarizing, huh? Some of you were quite understanding and appreciative of the points I made, while others were…less so. I figure I should take some time to address a few of the more, shall we say grave concerns brought up by my little lesson in manners. Twelve of them, to be precise.

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  • eelizg23

    I loved your article yesterday! But I didn’t comment yesterday so as to avoid getting caught in the line of fire. But yeah, since tattoos are a permanent part of my body, they’re pretty fucking personal, and I don’t have to have a reason or an explanation for any dick who decides to ask me. That said, compliment away! I’ll always take a compliment.

    Two incidents come to mind where asking about my tats really pissed me off. First was when this dude was hitting on me and showed me his tat, looked at my tat that was visible and asked if I had any others. I said yes, but I couldn’t show it to him in the shirt I was wearing. So he decided to hound me to try to get me to take off my shirt so he could see it. NOT COOL. The second time was when the man working the register at a pizza shop asked me why I got my tat, and I gave him some a kind of vague answer, and he said, “That’s the worst excuse for a tattoo I’ve ever heard. You should at least make up a better story to tell people.”

    • L

      Please stop using “tat” as a word.

  • lena

    I think you and your ink are beautiful!!!! Screw all the naysayers!

  • Amanda Chatel

    I’m going to go out on a limb and say that Patrick has probably been shot down on more than one occasion by a classy woman with tattoos. Poor Patrick. Being rejected is a bitch.

  • Cee

    You really should have let the issue die. It wasn’t the biggest deal in the world. As a blogger you should be prepared for disagreement and trolls (aka Patrick).

    Is this going to be a sorta STFUTheGlossReadersWhoDontAgreeWithMe thing now?

    It’s almost XOJaneish.

    • Brooke

      I agree. I get that vibe from this site, so I tend to not comment on articles I don’t agree with. There are ways to voice your opinion without being disrespectful, and I thought this article was intended to be disrespectful to those that didn’t agree with her point of view.

    • Nancy

      Well I’m very glad she answered me, anyway, and I found the rest hilarious! Thank you Jamie!

      And for all the other people who think tattoos are just for attention: there probably are people who do that, but honestly I had no clue that almost every single person who sees a tattoo would ask about it. It’s for myself.

    • not jamie peck

      i have a couple and i got them for me and i love them. they have meaning but they are also for decoration – i like the way the look.

      but i’m with nancy – i had no idea so many people would ask about them. really, i didn’t get them for attention. i’ve never asked other people with tattoos about theirs unless i was really good friends with them and genuinely curious, so when i got mine i was blown away (am blown away) by how many people comment/ask about them.

      one time, i didn’t feel like going into the meaning of one of them so i said “it has personal meaning to me.” the questioner got huffy and then told me i shouldn’t have put it in such a “public” place. are you kidding me? i didn’t put it there to get attention and in retrospect, while i have no regrets about getting it, i would have put it somewhere else. oh well, some people are rude.

    • cj

      Yeah.
      The first article annoyed me, so I stopped reading and moved on.
      Sheesh, Tattoo Girl, let it go.

  • Elle

    Gross, some of those comments are super Reddit-y.

  • Emma

    lol at all the people being all “What will you do when you’re old and have tattoos?”. My Grandma was the first person I knew to have tattoos and they still look awesome.

  • Sam

    Y’know, I feel like some of those comments’ authors would feel differently if they had ever had a person walk up behind them and (with NO conversation, greeting, request for permission, or greeting involved) start tracing their tattoos. I have had this happen several times, and it’s WEIRD. Weird, weird, weird. If someone has shoes with pretty colored straps or hair with fun colored streaks, would it be appropriate for people to touch them? No. It wouldn’t. It’d be fucking weird.

    Also, in regards to the “OMG WHEN UR OLD U WILL TOTES HATE UR TATTOOS” argument:
    1) That’s if I get old. That’s just assuming we’ll all live til we’re 75+ and have the luxury of regretting our youthful choices.
    2) Who the fuck are you to judge when people with tattoos will be “sick” of them?
    3) If/when I’m hella old, my skin will be spotted and wrinkled, my boobs will be saggy, my hips will barely function, and my hair will be white. Are the tattoos REALLY gonna make me look less hot?
    4) Again, question: Who the fuck are you to judge?

    Sigh. I liked the original article. I think it discussed a topic I hadn’t seen talked about yet here.

    • Gypsy

      AGREED!!!! And that’s a great idea, btw! The next time someone starts touching my tattoos, I’m going to start touching their face or something :)

    • whorefinder

      Typical feminist logic. Equate asking about a tattoo with physically touching someone without permission. Great argument, keep making it.

    • K

      “ever had a person walk up behind them and (with NO conversation, greeting, request for permission, or greeting involved) start tracing their tattoos.”

      @whorefinder – did you read this part of the comment? Tracing tattoos with your finger equals touching.

      Equating someone touching you to someone who asks politely and in the appropriate setting is a typical weirdo logic. Keep using it.

  • Stitch

    Apparently Jamie didn’t get enough attention from her first article on her tattoos, she had to write another one poking fun at the commenters who didn’t agree with her. Any credibility she had as a writer (and there wasn’t much to begin with) just flew out the window.
    Classic.

    • self help

      When people act like douchebags, they deserved to be called out on their unsightly behavior, js.

    • Brittany

      Couldn’tve said it better.

      I’m just going to go back to pretty much exclusively reading The Editor’s Debate.

  • Fabel

    I’m really not understanding why people are so offended by this. Most of the commenters who “disagreed” with the first post were having an overblown reaction & deserve to be called out. I think it’s nice when blogs actually address dissenting comments.

  • Megan

    I completely agree!!! I love getting compliments, but I hate when people ask what they mean, because no matter what they do mean, there’s virtually no way to explain the meaning of a tattoo to a stranger without sounding like an a$$hole. The worst part is that you know you sound like a douche but you still have to keep talking!! It’s the worst.

  • Jill

    As someone who has tattoos and hates ‘explaining’ them or talking about them, at all, i really appreciated your article and could relate to everything you were saying. I didn’t find it narcisstic in any way and am not sure why that was one of the negative comments. Anyone who criticizes is just seeing things in douche-vision, doesn’t have any tattoos and can’t relate. there is nothing more annoying then listening to someone justify their tattoos for insane reasons. ‘These stars represent each of my sisters and my mom’ really? they are stars? so meaningful.

    • Ellie

      Absolutely agree that listening to strangers talk about the meanings of their tattoos is so irritating. If I don’t know you, I don’t care. Does anyone wax on about the poetic meanings of their ink for any other reason than to get laid? I’m sure you’re suuuper deep and intellectual, but I don’t care.

      I have tattoos that are very personal to me. Some people get frustrated when I don’t want to talk about them. Like “well why is it on your wrist if you don’t want me to ask about it?”

      I’m sorry folks, I guess I was being super selfish for not thinking of you and your feelings when I was getting this tattoo. The fact that I wanted it somewhere easily visible to ME, without looking in a mirror, to remind me of something very personal should be irrelevant. Because YOU are so interested in it and/or offended by it. I deeply, DEEPLY apologize.

    • not jamie peck

      sorry for the double comment but THIS! yes, this all the time. i got it on my wrist for my own reasons and sometimes i don’t feel like explaining those reasons to strangers and then they get all mad and try to make ME feel small and rude.

  • Kj

    Yeah… certain people (whose names may rhyme with “hat trick”) seem to have a little too much time on their hands.

    All I wanna add to the conversation is that I can understand why you post these responses, I would consider it “feeding the trolls”… it’s only going to encourage them :P (Obvs this does not apply to the sincere/polite comments you responded to.)

  • Gypsy

    First, I read the original article about tattoo etiquette. I enjoyed it and thought it was funny. And some parts – very true. I myself have 18 tattoos (going for #19 this weekend) and several piercings throughout various parts of my body. Guess this takes me off Patrick’s list! Heaven’s to Betsy, whatever shall I do??? Oh wait – I have a list that crosses off people who don’t like people with tattoos – problem solved. I am WELL aware of what people think when they see me. Whether you like my appearance or not, it doesn’t matter to me. I put my ink here for ME. If you like it – great! You can like without touching. The minute some random guy puts his hands on me – whether he’s touching a tattoo or not, I have a problem. You’re now invading my personal space.

    I’m a Gloss reader not because I take everything said here as truth, but because I enjoy the articles. I enjoy the sense of humor you writers have and you all make me smile. So thank you. And for those who sit here and feel it’s necessary to piss on our tattooed parade – Don’t you have ANYTHING better to do? Shut up and enjoy the articles. There’s no need to attack the author. If you don’t like what she has to say, don’t read her stuff.

  • Nicky

    Now you’re just being annoying.

  • isabel

    based on the original article and these responses, You are my new favorite blogger.

  • LCT

    Bravo, Jamie! Well done. I like your responses to Patrick better than mine. ;)

  • Leah

    Holy shit, did the original article end up on the agenda at the International Trolls Convention or something? Doesn’t really seem that controversial. It can mostly be summed up with “don’t be a douche”.

    PS: I call dibs on “Ladies With Six Flaming Skulls” as a band name. Look for LWSFS coming to a city near you.

  • Abigail

    As a woman with a tattoo that is asked about frequently by everyone from young children (“Oooh! Pretty! I want one!”) to adults, I have a couple of thoughts. First, I read your original post, and didn’t think it was over the top. I didn’t necessarily agree with it, because I don’t have any problem with people asking about mine, but I’ve found a way to condense the story into just a few words, without sounding ridiculous. But as an American, you have a right to your legitimate opinion. Second, try not to take it so personally. People like to talk smack and like to bitch about whatever you say. If you’d written a post about much you just LOVE people to talk about your tattoos, they would have had a problem with that, too. Smirk at the naysayers and know you’re a cooler, more fabulous woman because you have beautiful art that you love on your body. (Not a dig at people who don’t have tattoos…) Nice job keeping a humorous outlook on the people who try to put you down. :)

  • Megs

    YESSSSSS, I made the cut!

    Haha. At least I wasn’t one trying to rip you a new asshole? Eh?

    Lol. I realize that I never mentioned this, but I do think your tattoos are beautiful XD

  • Cheri

    I agree with Jaydee. If you’re going to wear that low cut top you really can’t complain about people glancing. You exposed it yourself. Me saying that, however, does not mean I’m of the mindset of “she was asking for it.”

  • whorefinder

    leave it to a feminist to equate people asking her a question about her appearance that she chose to make with rape.

    This is why women have never created any civilization on earth. Too dumb, too self-centered.

    • Karen

      “This is why women have never created any civilization on earth.”

      I’m sorry, what parallel universe are you from? Without the existence of both women and men, creating any form of civilization would be physically impossible. Just throwing it out there.

    • Ella

      Don’t feed the troll…

  • LM

    “… it is nice to be told it is nice.”

    No. It is nice because it makes one feel nice to wear it. Someone is seeking a bit too much attention if she is wearing things just to be told it looks pleasing.

  • Karen

    “I’m concerned you may have a rare disorder called douchevision”. I fucking love you.

  • Achelle

    I am appalled by the extremely RUDE comments that people are posting!

    Anyway I completely understand what you’re saying I’ve been in restaurants or out shopping and couldn’t get proper customer service because the cashier was too distracted by my tattoos. “WOW what’s that behind your ear?”… I smile politely and reply that it’s a bow and attempt to go on with my order and then I get… “oh that’s so pretty what made you get that”…. at this point I’m annoyed because I just want to order my damn food! You’re at work, be professional, take my order and go away!

    I got the bow because I like bows it’s not a big deal. I love it, it’s one of my favorite tattoos and I don’t mind a comment. I understand sometimes it catches people off guard because it’s behind my ear and they don’t notice until they stare at my head for 30 secs but when I’ve answered and then moved on that should note that I don’t care to carry on a conversation about my tattoos.

  • Rebecca

    I can’t believe how RUDE some of the responses are! Coming from someone who has a very visible tattoo on my back shoulder, I love talking about it with people (Maybe there’s that NPD again….haha) But I really hate when people just take my choice of body art as an invitation to touch me. (Seriously people, STOP randomly tracing my tattoo–I don’t know you, it’s creepy)Or think I’m some kinky sex woman into S&M (I wouldn’t have said it if it had not happened). I completely agree with Jamie, the author. I have other tattoos that are deeply personal and not things I bring up with everyone. Yes, it’s on my foot where you can see it–but please, when I tell you it’s a long story, take the hint.

    And as for people like “asking for it” Patrick, and “whorefinder” I feel sorry for you, as I do all other misogynists.

  • Mo

    I come on here a lot, and I read the articles and mostly keep my comments to myself, because if someone’s opinion piece truly upsets me to the point that I need to make a counter argument about it and try to convey my point in a comment box, then clearly I’ve been on the internet too long today. My point is, why can’t people just chill? If Jamie thinks some people need to back off, and I’m sure some of those people she “offended” had to justify their annoying ways by posting an arbitrary comment, then simply take it as that. It’s her opinion.

    Note to self, next time you see her out at a bar, you won’t be tempted to ask, and leave it at that. Its not brain surgery people. So relax.