• Mon, Jan 30 2012

Here’s A Dress Featuring A Cyclops Boob

I think we can all agree that breasts are wonderful. No one’s going to be mad at seeing a boob, in fashion, or in print, or in real life.

But I also think it’s safe to say that no one wants to see gross misinterpretations of boobs, and unfortunately, that’s exactly what one designer recently created. Gianni Molaro debuted the above number, which looks like something out of a “Futurama” nightmare, at Alta Roma fashion week.

It would be one thing if this were an incredible design aside from the boob. But it isn’t. It’s ill-fitting and oddly asymmetrical, insofar as it doesn’t look like it’s asymmetrical on purpose. In short, it looks like something that would get someone kicked off “Project Runway” faster than Heidi Klum can say “divorce” (burn).

The whole thing is made even worse by the fact that Molaro made the model walk halfway down the runway with her arms crossed over her one breast:

But perhaps you disagree…? Do you see something in this cyclops boob dress that I don’t? Feel free to comment.

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  • Katrina

    What the actual fuck?
    No, you didn’t miss anything, it is really that terrifying.
    Horrific from the weird little plucked sparrow arms, to the giant flipper bottom… and that thing in between.

  • Goldie

    Obvious GaGa bait.

    • Gypsy

      That’s EXACTLY where my thoughts were headed! My first reaction to this was “Looks like something Lada GaGa would wear in concert”

      Also – reminds me of the aliens on The Simpsons. And now I want to watch the Halloween episodes.

  • A. Nuran

    Proof that fashion designers are woman-hating Martians. The only way I can imagine an actual woman wearing it on her own personal body is cosplaying at a science fiction convention cosplaying something from a Guillermo del Toro movie

  • Regina

    I would like it but it’s constructed so awfully. Random messy folds. Just looks cheap.

  • rikki Doxx

    WTF? Who buys that stuff?

    • A. Nuran

      Nobody

    • orca999

      It’s not. It’s considered “art” and used as a promotion for their other clothing lines.

  • Rhaspun

    Hey those so called creative people think anything they do is awesome.

  • Skipdallas

    I will order two kilo’s of whatever that guy was smoking when he designed that piece of crap.

  • Mr Perfect

    This dress reminds me of a lunch lady from HS that only had 1 breast. Sometimes on cold lunch days her nipple would get rock hard like it was about to poke right thru her damn shirt. That shit turned me on so f-ing much! This dress is even better b/c you aren’t distracted by a missing breast, and you can just focus on the 1 succulent monstrous tit she does have. I would hump the shit out of that dress.

    • SA

      Go ahead. Will probably be all you’ll get for a long, long time.

  • Bryan Hupperts

    I’m thinking of doing a horror film about feminists from Mars. Egads! Now I have a costume concept. Or is it just a One Tit Wonder?

  • Wicked_One

    Nothing has made me happier to not be a model.

  • olivia

    oh my! so fashionable! when can i buy?!

  • Nicole

    Holy fuck me sideways and call me a virgin Batman, what the fuck is that?