Illustrated Guide: How To Have Fun At Strip Clubs If You’re A Girl

In college, I went to some strip clubs. I’m a girl, so I have a pretty easy time of it at nudie bars: free lap dances, lots of genitals rubbed to and fro about my person, and much free soda. However, many girls don’t realize that they, too, can have fun at strip clubs. In fact, they believe that strip clubs are the dominion of professional football players, cage fighters and men who “get tatted.” They’re wrong! So, I’ve written and “illustrated” this extremely helpful guide to making the most of your strip club experience as a lady.

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    • JS

      Another tip may be to bring some sort rug/towel/muslin (anything disposable) with you to cover the floor in the bathroom stall, just in case the floors are mirrors. Mirrored floors are GREAT for a 6 foot line of blow, but terrible for privacy.

    • Cee

      Lady strippers can actually teach you to be nice to women. I have never seen women so happy to see women enter a building than in a strip club. That doesn’t happen in most places. Strippers tend to be more liberal with women because for the most part, the women that are there to see them aren’t going to treat them like a piece of meat or at least not as horribly as men do. However, that doesn’t mean you are free to do something heinously inappropriate. Some of them can get really chatty. My friend actually talked to one of the strippers giving her a lap dance about her children and exchanged parenting tips, hah turn off, but adorably cute.
      I would also advice you to go with men because going with women can bring one of your female friend’s inner homophobe when they see you get too comfortable with a naked woman. But vice versa, going to a male strip club with a guy might bring out THEIR inner homophobe.

      • Ashley Cardiff

        I’d say that the problem here is “being friends with homophobes.”

      • melissa petro

        Actually, I would not describe the way most men treat strippers as “horrible.” Sometimes, sure, but certainly not as the rule. In fact, sometimes it’s the women (female “customers”– if you can call them that, seeing as they’re generally not tipping) that can be really shitty. Like the time some bitch pointed at me, laughing, and said “you know HER boobs are real!!” Har. Har.

        As a former stripper who just happens to also be a girl/woman (let’s remember those categories are not mutually exclusive) I can say there’s a lot of problematic stuff with this post and its comments, but I will leave it at that.

      • Cate

        As another former stripper, I have to agree with Melissa. While the majority of men accept the fact that they are there to pay for a service, most lady ‘customers’ seem to think that because they have the same plumbing as the strippers, they’re entitled to special treatment or immunity to tipping etiquette.

        Remember ladies, the slide about being nice and polite is true, and part of being nice and polite in a strip club is tipping.

    • Tes

      This is amazing

    • PMO

      So good! #9 <3<3<3

    • anon today

      Whatever else you do, don’t stand in the doorway in drunken shock and shout “That woman has no pubic hair!”

      Thank goodness it was really loud in there and the only person who heard me was the bouncer.

    • howtogrowgoddesses

      I used to bartend at a tittie club, and I have to say that the female customers were usually the worst. Not all, but many. I dunno, maybe it’s social conditioning that most men know what they can’t get away with when interacting with the ladies, but the female customers would get ejected disproportionately often for things like grabbing dancers/staff and generally being obnoxious drunken twats who don’t tip.