Gallery: Your Break-Up Survival Guide

You can’t eat. You can’t sleep. Your heart is so broken that you’re quite certain you’re dying and if you’re still alive in the morning it will be a miracle.

You have never felt this horrible, gut-wrenching sadness before in all your life and you haven’t been able to keep food down for days. Yes, you’ve had your heart broken before, but this time is worse than any other time. You’re literally dying inside; you can feel your heart splitting in two and there’s nothing you can do about it, and no amount of advice or reaffirming that “this too shall pass” or “you’re better off without him” will quell the pain.

You may not have loved him the most, or even the longest, but you loved him best, and that’s the stuff that keeps you up at night — that’s a fact that keeps you from being able to let go, move on and pull yourself from the sheets where he used to sleep.

Breaking up is probably one of the hardest things you’ll ever do and not just because of the boyfriend aspect, but because you lose your best friend, too. We won’t try to tell you to suck it up, quit your tears and get over it. However, we will give you a few tips that can help in the healing process, although the only real cure is time or medical memory erasing. I really wish doctors could make that procedure an option stat.

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    • rita

      im totally in love right now but i have been down breakup road and this is GOOD. no, really, it’s great advice.

      • Amanda Chatel

        Rita, your approval makes me all smiley like. Merci!

    • Sam

      I needed this. I just got out of a two year relationship with somebody who was my best friend, my partner in dinner parties & drunk fiascos alike. I don’t even know if I miss our love-y relationship so much as I miss just hanging out. Plus we incorporated one another into just about every aspect of our lives so literally everything reminds me of him (I recall thinking about this exact dilemma while we were dating and attempting to quell the amount of inside jokes we developed so I wouldn’t be sad about them later…it didn’t really work).

      I needed this advice and I am so glad you guys posted this today. I’ve been casually dating (i.e. runnin’ around town) several people and it’s the only way I feel any better/number. But I’m relocating to Brooklyn in six months (I currently live in southern California) partially because I need a change, partially because I need to not be reminded of my serious relationships of the last four years (coll-eeeege, woo!) anymore. So that last slide? It really reaffirmed my decision. Thank you.

      • Amanda Chatel

        Dearest Sam:

        I’m so happy we could help. My situation sounds very similar to yours… and it came to an end this past weekend. Writing this was me “dealing” with it… along with doing an apt swap and getting the hell of out of town for the month of March… I’m off to Paris.

        But if you’ll be relocating to Brooklyn, let’s get drinks and exchange war stories… or even better, something far more uplifting!

      • Sam

        Not even joking, hanging out with somebody whose writing I totally dig on a website I obsessively check would be supremely wonderful.

        I actually kinda just got ditched by my date tonight, too (he has to “bottle his beer” or something…hipster jerk), so your comment helped me feel better again. So, uno mas gracias!

      • Amanda Chatel

        Seriously Sam… finding friends in NYC is a bitch… here’s my email: chatel.amanda@gmail.com

        Obvs, I put that out there to anyone else as well… but when you get here, email me… like for realz…

    • TB

      I too have been recently tainted by the cruel brush of love. I write this wearing my highest high heeled boots and berry red lipstick, from the airport lounge with a glass of bubbles in hand. Indeed, f*cking awesome advice. :)

      • Amanda Chatel

        Good! As I respond to you, I’m drunk on champagne in my red lipstick and my only Vera Wang gown… embrace it, love!

    • Michelle

      I flew to Paris and spent Christmas there by myself precisely to get away from the shadows of a man who is clearly not worth my time, energy, or love. I knew not one word of French nor a Parisian soul, but it was the best thing I’ve ever done on my own.

      It took me a few more months after that to really let go of him, but I got there. And Paris will forever hold a whimsical place in my heart because it proved to me more than ever, that I can and will stand strong on my own two feet.

      • Amanda Chatel

        Exactly.
        And this comment made me a bit teary-eyed because my days here in paris are numbered and I’m not quite ready to go back to city full of bad (and good) memories.