Red State Dating Ideas Just In Time For Valentine’s Day

As I’ve already explained today, I live in Indiana. It’s a fun state full of corn fields and county fairs.

Things work a little differently here in the Midwest. So just in time for the most romantic holiday of all, I thought I would give you a couple tips on how to get down like a country girl. Okay, you aren’t really going to “get down.” In the Midwest, country is just the music we listen to. That’s why I like to refer to our social scene as red state dating.

Here are some great examples of conservative dating. Trust me, I’ve had plenty of experience in this arena. I can still remember the day when I found an Ann Coulter quote on a date’s Facebook page. I knew to be very afraid.

*Sidenote, if you find yourself in Bloomington (the college campus of Indiana University) or Indianapolis (the only real city in the state), you can revert to more traditional and accepted forms of courtship.

**Just in case you’re offended, this was kind of meant to be a joke. Although I do know someone who went hunting on a first date.

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    • Elise

      Okay, I’m all for making fun of Fort Wayne. I was born and raised there for 18 years, and admittedly there are ridiculous, frustrating aspects about living in a mid-sized midwestern city that you don’t quite notice until you’ve lived in a larger city or costal region for a while (i.e. strangers asking what church you go to, homophobic comments made regularly, cornfields within city limits) but these articles you’ve been writing (I’m referring to the skinny jeans piece as well) are frustrating for me to read. Surely there is a way to point out the uniqueness of a region, the people who live there, their belief systems and way of life, without sounding like a British colonist circa 1900s. You sound annoyed that you’re in a new environment, and the people there are not exactly like you. Take some time to talk to the people around you. Hang out at places in Fort Wayne where skinny jeans and platform sneakers hang out together (Coney Island, Hyde Brothers Booksellers, Cindy’s Dinner). You might see unironic trucker hats and Cosby sweaters. You might see a lot of republican bumper stickers. You might also get to know some pretty cool people. Don’t be an ugly American within your own borders.

    • Avodah

      Lindsey- I grew up on a farm on Iowa. For the record- Iowa is a swing state. It is also home to The University of Iowa which, while not Harvard, has an excellent journalism, business and English professors. Other states can boast University of Missouri, Minnesota, Wisconson, Kansas which are also great universities with students from all over the world.

      My parents are Republicans. Did I mention that my mom is an organic farmer? I go to graduate school at a very prestigious university in —gasp— Chicago. I speak 2 languages besides English and have lived all over.

      The Midwest is full of all kinds of people- rednecks, Republicans, blue-collar workers, teachers, businesspeople, Liberals, whoever. It is a shame you haven’t taken the time to get to know more people.

    • sarah

      i agree. enough with the “midwest people are uniformly ignorant, anti-abortion enthusiasts who have no idea how uncool they are” pieces. why?? i see that this piece was meant as a joke, but it crossed the line into insulting.

      • Avodah

        Agreed. I grew up in a small town. Sure, many of the people didn’t go college, loved Jesus and owned guns. HOWEVER, in October, when my grandfather died our neighbors and friends gave their condolences, but also showed love, support and care for my family.

        I don’t care if they were wearing mom jeans and Nebraska Cornhuskers sweatshirts.

    • kthy

      —–, is she? One of my friends told me he saw Kim Kardashian has a personal profile at an tallconnect site called—— ‘TallLoving. С’ o M–Many sexy photos were found
      on that site last week! I can’t beleive it! What happened?

    • Nashvillian

      Good God. What is wrong with you? Are you so convinced that no one in a “red state” would ever read this website? Obviously it’s impossible that anyone who attends church or likes to shoot guns might EVER read the gloss; we are utterly incapable of appreciating your high quality of writing and journalism.

      Of course, there’s no way I, a simple church secretary, reared in Alabama, should/could/would ever read this website. You’ve made it perfectly clear I’m not your audience.

    • Raquel

      I’m a Democrat living in the middle of Oklahoma, the reddest of the red states. While I’m sure there are people who will go to a gun range for Valentine’s Day, I seriously doubt that 1) that’s a popular activity on Valentine’s Day and 2) red states are exclusively where people will do any of these things today. I bet you could find couples going to the gun range in Massachusetts and California.

      It’s one thing to talk about the characteristics of a certain region, but this post is just full of ignorant stereotypes. Sarah Palin isn’t on a book tour. There isn’t a Republican Debate tonight. Who would want to do any of that on Valentine’s Day anyway?

      This post is exactly the reason that people in red states equate the word “Liberal” with the word “Elitist.” My neighbors are good people and frankly don’t appreciate being reduced to a ridiculous caricature.

      • MR

        Yeah, and they seemed very pissed – shelving the moderate conservative Romney for Santorum. I didn’t see that coming. Romney still has the better campaign organization though, and he has misstepped before. Not that I want him to put his sh*t back together. Obama will roll Santorum. Gingrich is in the rearview mirror now.