Paris Hilton has gone from most reviled figure in pop culture to mostly forgotten, but now that we live in the age of Kim Kardashian, we kind of miss her. …Although obviously we don’t because Hilton’s ability to parlay grotesque narcissism and venality into stardom (while maintaining she’s a “business woman” who plays a “character” on TV) is the reason Kim Kardashian exists.
…Shit. What we mean to say is Paris Hilton is 31-years-old and dressed like a 16-year-old trust fund girl at Coachella. And she has a goddamn thong tan. Paris Hilton, apparently, never left the early ’00s.