‘Bath Salts Zombie Cannibal’ Rudy Eugene Wasn’t Actually On Bath Salts

Photo credit: Miami Herald, CNN

Back in May, when the story of “bath salts zombie cannibal” Rudy Eugene hit the news, people became extremely unnerved by the supposed impending zombie apocalypse. To deal with their fears, many assumed his face-eating attack was a gnarly side effect of the terrifying street drug known as bath salts, and/or “new LSDs” according to the fear-mongering doctors wheeled out by several news stations. Either way, no one wanted to believe that a naked Eugene attacked 65-year-old Ronald Poppo under the MacArthur Causeway and mutilated his face for no reason.

Turns out, he kind of did: the toxicology report is in and the only drug is Eugene’s system was marijuana. According to the medical examiner’s statement:

“The department’s toxicology laboratory has identified the active components of marijuana. The laboratory has tested for but not detected any other street drugs, alcohol or prescription drugs…This includes cocaine, LSD, amphetamines (Extasy, Meth and others), phencyclidine (PCP or Angel Dust), heroin, oxycodone, Xanax, synthetic marijuana (Spice), and many other similar compounds. Within the limits of current technology by both laboratories, marijuana is the only drug identified in the body of Mr. Rudy Eugene.”

Obviously marijuana doesn’t make you eat people, so unless there was some sort of undetectable super drug in Eugene’s system, we’re dealing with a tragic, nightmarish story of mental illness. Which we would very well be dealing with even if bath salts were involved.

Either way, this startling new development will probably lead to thousands of uninspired “munchies” jokes on Twitter.

(NBC Miami)

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    • T-Lex

      My guess would be “Dippers” which is basically pot dipped in formaldehyde (gross right?) its pretty popular in low income communities and its pretty awful in terms of what it does to your brain.

      • Ashley Cardiff

        I believe that is real purely because it seems impossible to make up.

      • MM

        Formaldehyde is slang for PCP. I’m pretty sure actual formaldehyde is just poisonous, without any recreational potential.

      • tttekron88

        claire speaks the truth!! rehab > jail. “getting wet” or “getting dead” or whatever you want to call it is when you smoke the liquid form of PCP on some sort of plantlife or however. formaldehyde has nothing to do with it, it’s just slang added to the “getting dead” because you dip the blunt or whatever you smoke in what they call “embalming fluid”. but it’s really just pcp in liquid form.

    • claire

      Drugs are not the issue, or are a secondary issue. We have an underfunded, unsustainable mental health system in this country. There are sick people who are shuttled between jail and overcrowded short-term mental health hospitals who do not have the resources or ability to treat patients, so they end up on the street.

    • Spastastic

      I have heard that he was mentally ill and self-medicating with pot, then went off it for four days and had a psychotic break.

    • lucygoosey74

      Goddamn, I was sure it was going to be bath salts or PCP.
      Still one of the freakiest stories ever.