• Fri, Jul 6 2012

For The Sake Of Fashion And Your Vagina’s Happiness, Consider Going The ‘No Undies’ Route This Summer

My gynecologist has long told me that women shouldn’t wear underwear to bed. She stated that your vag needs some down time to breathe and not be stifled by cotton, lace, silk — whatever your favorite fabric might be. I told her I can’t sleep naked alone without feeling, well, weird (I know! It’s a hangup, OK?), so she told me to get some baggy boxers and wear those to bed instead. Sometimes I do, and sometimes I just wear my underwear, because they’re pretty, all right? And I want to have nice undies on should I get laid in my dream, OK?

But here’s the deal: your vagina doesn’t really like underwear, especially in the summer. In fact, your treasure chest of delight would actually prefer if you opt out of underwear even when you’re not in your bed. That’s right, ladies, your vag wants you to go commando and do it now!

For starters your vagina does not like to be associated with panty lines. Sometimes even thongs can leave a line and it distracts from your entire outfit and it looks pretty tacky, and as though you just don’t care. Do you really need people to know it’s granny-panty day, because you have to do laundry? Yes? Well, high-five for being you! I still don’t get it.

Secondly, as my gynecologist pointed out your vagina does need to aerate especially in the summer months when it’s sweltering and there’s a “swamp ass” situation going on down there. All that moisture just hanging out, similar to sitting in a wet bathing suit too long, is just a yeast infection waiting to happen. A yeast infection will lead to some heavy duty itching and until that Diflucan kicks in, you’ll be hiding behind everything you possibly can just so you can get a good rake at your goods and ease what feels like a million mosquitoes that decided to dine on your tender bits a hundred times over.

Lastly, and not as important, no underwear is sexy — or so I hear. Some men and women think it’s hot because it’s daring, or maybe it’s just the idea of easy access. No matter the exact reason, as I’m sure it differs for each person, it is viewed as an “ooh la la,” type of fashion choice.

Whether if it’s because you like feeling “ooh la la,” or you don’t want to get caught clawing at your vagina while in line at the supermarket, perhaps you should give the no underwear method a whirl this summer. One note of caution though: I hear it can be either dreadful or heavenly with jeans, depending on the sensitivity of your clit. Orgasming all the way across town may seem like a dream, but it could be awkward for others.

 

Photo: ImprovEverywhere

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  • epilonious

    “…you’ll be hiding behind everything you possibly can just so you can get a good rake at your goods and ease what feels like a million mosquitoes that decided to dine on your tender bits a hundred times over.”

    I love this phrase, even though my gayness dictates I should just add it to a file of reasons to run screaming from the ladyparts, it made me smile and sympathize and hope all women the world over never, ever have to deal with a yeast infection ever again ever.

    I’ll also offer high fives to any women doing little dances in Jeans and seeming /really/ happy.

  • Tania

    I’ve never worn underwear with my pyjamas. Since I was little, my mom informed me and my sisters of that very thing – that things need to breath.

    But, oddly, the last guy I slept with thought it was weird, but awesome. I thought it was normal.

    • Tania

      And since it seems relevant, I haven’t ever had a UTI or yeast infection. Related? Maybe!

    • Jenny

      Tania – me too! I’ve always slept in the buff (and am often pantless on weekends). I have never had a UTI or a yeast infection.

      Nudity is good for you!

  • meg

    until that Diflucan kicks in, you’ll be hiding behind everything you possibly can just so you can get a good rake at your goods and ease what feels like a million mosquitoes that decided to dine on your tender bits a hundred times over.

    ….just pure brilliance. excellent writing. taking pantaloons off immediately! :)

  • Meagan S

    I have never heard of this before… and now I am wondering why my gyno has never said anything to me.

  • Lo

    It depends on all the other fabrics touching your skin. If I go without cotton underwear but put on my faux-ocelot trousers with the PVC lining (available from all good Etsy stores), that will not improve the ventilation. Also, a seam in the wrong place is excruciating on all the non-clit parts.

  • holleeta

    I never sleep with underwear and am generally a nudist in my apartment – saves me from doing laundry. However, I’ve only gone commando in public twice in my life. I don’t really like it because I hate sitting like a lady yet I love wearing dresses.

    When I need to be seamless, I wear cotton Commando panties. They are pricey but I swear by them. The boyshorts are so comfy and don’t show a seam even in the tightest of dresses.

    I can’t imagine wearing my tight jeans and no panties! How uncomfortable. Perhaps if I didn’t shave for months and rocked a down-there-afro, then maybe.

  • Brianna

    “Whether if it’s because you like feeling “ooh la la,” or you don’t want to get caught clawing at your vagina while in line at the supermarket”

    Love that line! Shifting underwear can cause you to claw at your ass in the supermarket line too, and I don’t want to be caught doing that either which is why I love going commando whenever possible.

  • Amanda Chatel

    So, because I wrote this, I figured I needed to try it out. Last night I went totally commando, in a short dress mind you, so as Holleeta pointed out I did find myself keeping my legs extra crossed and locked in that position.

    And since I had just gotten a wax earlier in the day, I totally felt like walking sex. It was fun!

  • Southerngirl

    If you cannot sit like a lady, exit or enter a car correctly, etc.DO NOT DO IT. Not because I think the human body is unattrative. No, it is just so awkward when you see someone who cannot be … discreet.

  • kitty

    Going commando is a choice, but PLEASE, ladies, if you borrow your friend’s jeans, don’t get your crotch sauce all over them! My ex-roommate was not very clean and she would wear my jeans for DAYS with no undies…which is of course a yeast infection waiting to happen. I did not want those pants back, even after they were washed in hot water.

  • bugsy88

    Well, I feel a ton better about my commando lifestyle! And apparently a little ahead of my time! Ive been living free for about 12 years! My DH is also loving it. Makes for some interesting road trips!

    I just, today, discovered this site, and I love the use of the word vagina. For so long society has deemed it a dirty word. Whatever. I am so glad to see it coming out of the closet! Or going commando! Thank you!