“The offing was barred by a black bank of clouds, and the tranquil water-way leading to the uttermost ends of the earth flowed somber under an overcast sky–seemed to lead into the heart of an immense darkness.” -Joseph Conrad, Heart of Darkness
Yesterday, at approximately 12:45, I arrived at a fashion show. This may not sound terribly unusual for a woman of my profession during the fashion season. But today was different; the air was thinner somehow. I was used to civilized presentations but had been promised a spectacle the likes of which I’d never seen, though I knew little more. Upon arriving at the arena, I discovered an inscription–this was to be a collection of athletic wear designed by Samantha Giancola, know occasionally as Sammi Sweetheart of MTV’s doomed documentary series Jersey Shore. As I ascended the steps of the looming Metropolitan Pavilion and slipped inside, I wondered, “Why would athletic wear necessitate such fanfare?” It was decadence, I’d learn. Decadence all.
Inside, I came upon many grim casualties of cosmetic surgery. They milled about listless with their Louis Vuitton bags, blank eyes searching for a youth they could never recover. They rustled together on towering heels in a long line leading to a trio of PR girls, wielding three clipboards with great gravity and menace. The Erinyes. As I signed in and received my seating assignment, I could hear peculiar music throbbing beyond.
I arrived at my seat a few moments later to find this:
Was it blood, I wondered? Surely the dark splatter across my intended seat was a portent of some kind. Unsettled, I decided to take a walk and observe the facilities, to witness the machinations beyond.
These were the first humans I found. I thought it encouraging that they wished to communicate “peace.” Both, in fact:
Of what kind and with whom, I did not know. But I deduced that they would not harm me. Still uneasy from what I’d seen at my seat, I thought it cold comfort.
At a booth professing that the explorer of this place “Think thin,” I found a man attacking the lights. I figured him crazed by want of thinness.