Learning To Cook Reluctantly: How To Make A Cake With Two Kinds Of Pie In It

When I first head about pumpple – a combination of two kinds of cake and two kinds of pie – I assumed it must be the dessert of master chefs. Wedding cakes? Pah! Anyone can make a wedding cake. Only heroes can make pie-cake. Seriously. Look at this thing:


No. I was wrong. Turns out it’s totally, insanely easy.

Which is good, because my best friend’s (and sometimes man panelist!) birthday was coming up, and for months, he’s been saying all he wants is a pie cake. And I make happiness happen for people.

Look, even for me, it was very easy. I am saying that by my non-cookery standards. Now, to be fair, I imagine you can make it a lot more difficult if you do everything from scratch, but hahahahaahaha, no, I have a life. And by “a life” I mean “‘The Awful Truth’ isn’t going to watch itself, and Cary Grant is about to watch some dancing”. You know, before we start cooking, let’s all watch this together, it’s really funny:

I am deeply in love with Cary Grant.

I would bake a cake with two pies in it for him.

See how I tied that back?

Okay, so, here is how you start:


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    • Mackenzie

      Poor Ralph Bellamy, always losin’ his fiancees to Cary Grant.

    • Malkovich

      Remember that you need 3 inch high sided cake pans or there is going to be batter all over the oven. And it will be a mess and you will cry. And all the readers who have tried to make a pie cake will be sad and NEVER BELIEVE YOU AGAIN.

      • Jennifer Wright

        Hi, Mom. Thank you for reminding me about the pie pans.

    • Renee

      I don’t bake often, but I do love to watch cooking shows and it seems to be that you need to do a ‘crumb layer’ first. Basically put a thin layer of frosting on, and don’t worry about all the crumblyness. THEN put the cake in the fridge. The frosting should prevent drying out, and the colder frosting should prevent more crumbling when you put a second layer of frosting on. Or if you could try piping on the second layer. Fill a plastic bag with frosting, squeeze out excess air, twist it closed at the openning, and snip open a corner. Then you can frost by just squeezing out little loopy lines of frosting.

      • Renee

        Also…what does this taste like? I have never had, much less seen, a cake with a pie in it.

    • Ella

      This is like Sandra Lee’s Kwanzaa Cake only not offensive to an entire race of people.

      I don’t get why when Americans bake a cake, the recipe always calls for a box of cake mix. Or when they cook a pumpkin pie, they have to buy a can of pie pumpkin.

    • Kristina

      Why is there no picture of what it looks like on the inside?! You totally could have cut out a piece, taken a picture, put the piece back, touched up the frosting, then made like it was magic when you pulled an already-cut piece from the seemingly-whole cake. A birthday cake and magic trick all in one!

      But, seriously, how was it on the inside? Awesome and goopy or just too goopy? I’ve got a morbid fascination with this pumpple thing.

      • Jennifer Wright

        It was spectacular! And I’m not just saying that because I made it. It wasn’t too goopy, which was my main worry – the pies seemed like the blended with cake just enough, but did not get… absorbed into the cake, if that makes sense? And I wanted to take a picture but it was dark at the bar where the birthday was and frankly, people tore into it pretty quickly. And I was feeble and hesitant.

    • Cait

      But – but what did you do with the other half of the cake mix? DID I MISS THIS? WAS THERE A SECOND CAKE?

      • Jennifer Wright

        Oh, the second half of the cake mix goes on top of the pie. It’s that kind of revolting picture where the yellow cake covers the cherry pie. One cake mix per pie, clearly. You don’t mix them both together, although I suppose you could.

    • Penelope

      I’m having a stupid day, forgive the question – so you have 2 cake pans? You put a pie in each cake pan, then fill each with one cake mix each? Then you stack them when they come out of the oven? Or do all 4 ingredients go in one pan together?

      I’m easily confused.

      • Jennifer Wright

        Two cake pans. One cake mix and one pie in each pan.

    • Fabel

      This looks insane, in a good way, although I’d probably use two chocolate cream pies instead of anything berry or seasonal (if I ever attempted this)

      Also, baking from scratch isn’t too bad! I’ve always been appalled at how much work you still have to do with a mix (as in “what, you still have to crack the eggs? I thought this was the easy way out”) so you might as well just measure & use your own ingredients. Plus you’ll have “and it’s baked from scratch!” cred. (Or, 2nd option… you can buy raw frozen cake batter!)

    • Elizabeth

      Oh God, why you do?