With his face perfectly stuck in an awkward smile, it’s hard to tell who the hell is staring back at you from the cover of the new Vogue Paris issue. Who is that giddy man? Why is his jaw clenched? Is that strictly air-brushing, or did he lose a fight with scalpel-wielding plastic surgeon? Is he excited about being on the cover with Kate Moss or are his eyebrows on some sort of mission to be the star of the show? WHO IS THAT MAN?
Then after several minutes of pondering, you realize who it is; then you do some more pondering and curse society’s evil influence to stay wrinkle-free.
Et tu, George Michael, et tu?
My esteemed colleague, Ms. Jamie Peck, was kind enough to give us her thoughts on the George “Let Me Put Some Supermodels In My Video And Pretend It’s Still The 90′s” Michael video a couple months ago. If you watched it, in both confusion and sadness for the death of the 90′s, George still looks like himself, but just a finely matured version. All of that has been wiped clean on the Vogue Paris cover. If it weren’t for Kate making her usual Kate face, you’d probably be at a loss as to who the slightly-crazed looking man might be. At least Kate’s presence gives us some sort of inclination as to the mystery man’s identity.
Damn plastic surgery! Damn air-brushing!
So we can all sleep tonight, let’s look at George Michael back in the day. It will soothe us after the spectacle above:
Feel better now? Good. Me too.
Photo: Vogue Paris