You can try as you might, but if you ask every man you know if they’ve ever been told they “seem like a bitch,” you’ll find that it’s a strikingly low number. In my case, upon asking my male friends, I came up with a grand total of “never, unless it was a joke.”
Women can be bitches, men can be… assholes? Pricks? But that’s usually if they’ve actually done something negative already; it’s not really an air that one exudes. Cocky? Sure, but that’s often associated with self-assuredness and doesn’t have half the negative connotation that “bitch” does. Women are oft called “bitchy” even when they haven’t actually done anything that negative impacts those around them besides perhaps be less warm toward others or not be in an excellent mood all the time, but what’s our name for men like that? Asshole-y? That’s not a word, come now; it just sounds like you’re mispronouncing “Ashley.”
There have been exceptions to this rule for me because, fortunately, not everyone I’ve met first thinks I’m a bitch. Oddly enough, though, I’ve noticed that these few exceptions are people who also could be deemed “bitchy” for being decisive, unapologetic women. Ones who will criticize people for rape jokes and will not be forced to smile and definitely don’t, under any circumstance ever, use a slogan beginning with, “Lady in the street but a…”
So while I was in good company on the Supposed Bitch Mobile, and I logically know I haven’t done much to exude some form of unkind air, I still have often felt like I need to project an even friendlier impression towards other people. I tried to come off as a friendlier lady with the demeanor of a 1940s ingenue. Guess what happened then?