Miley Cyrus Dons Angry Bra On ‘The Tonight Show’

I know that title sounds strange, but please, just look at this Anthony Vaccarello top and tell me it doesn’t kind of look like an angry face. Here, let me use my extraordinary artistic skills to illustrate:

BUSTIER WANT FOOD.

I was gonna give Miley the benefit of the doubt and just assume she was wearing this top to The Tonight Show with Jay Leno as a bit of a joke. Perhaps it was simply to match the uncomfortable smile she donned throughout the show, who knows? But then I remembered that she wears bras in public a lot.

I’m ambivalent about bralettes as they usually don’t stay in place unless you have magical Katy Perry boobs that emit double-sided tape. Every time I’ve ever tried one on, I feel like a banana split in a wine glass: does it fit? If you cram it in, sure. Does it look fucking ridiculous? Yes, yes it does.

She also wore a pretty rad Manhattan skyline Moschino skirt which I honestly thought was awesome, but Mr. Frowny Face stole the fashion show from said skirt. Anything paired with a bustier belonging to a lost Homestar Runner character will not be noticed. Here’s a better shot of the full outfit.

BUSTIER LOOK OFF-SCREEN. Bustier sad. :(

During the interview, Cyrus always shared a clip from a newer song (which, strange as this sounds coming from my own mouth/keyboard, is pretty snazzy) and shared a brief engagement story about how what’s-his-face asked her to marry him after she sang the aforementioned song. It was not a particularly noteworthy interview, but the outfit made me significantly more interested.

I think Cyrus looks lovely in this outfit: her hair color and cut are great and the makeup is quite pretty. However, I just wish she’d chill out on the “I’M EDGY, ADULTS WEAR LEATHER, LOOK AT THIS FUCKING LEATHER ADULT BRA” thing; we get it, you’re engaged and a grown-up and not a child and mostly engaged. But dammit, this could’ve been a pretty great casual outfit had the top not reminded me of Bullet Bill a la Mario Kart.

Pic via JustJared

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    • Lo

      It’s the symbol this city needs.

      • http://www.facebook.com/sameurysm Samantha Escobar

        The hero this city deserves.

    • mm

      I understand why she went for it…it’s structural and sort of resembles building tops or something…..I just think that top is better suited to going clubbing or something. It’s so tiny it doesn’t really balance the bottom out. Maybe if her hair were longer?

    • sarah o

      homestar runner… awesome!
      and yes. that top is awful!

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Roger-Smith/100003483468250 Roger Smith

      Never seen a “child star’ rush so fast into sluttery as fast as she has. What a pathetic loser. WHO CARES!?!?!
      Right behind her, apparently is Anne Hathaway, complaining how her clean image gets in the way of her “sex appeal” I swear, Hollywierd can keep a city full of head shrinks very busy.

    • Mari

      That is a great outfit if you’re headed to a club, hoping to catch a guy’s eye. But sitting next to old men like Leno or Letterman is just creepy.

    • JOCOSuperman

      What is happening to her? What is she wearing? You know how politicians go to Washington DC and over time they become the cesspool that the environment creates for them? Same goes for Hollywood. Hollywood is a dysfunctional west coast Washington DC where people go to become something big and the majority get sucked into the dark side and lose their individuality. They try so hard to be “different”, but succumb to the pressures of others and then become like them.

      Its not easy to overcome the pressures. Hollywood or Washington DC, take your pick. Both will ruin you over time if you can not stay true to yourself. Both are controlled by money, and both cities everyone is trying to be in front of the camera.

      Dont get me wrong there are good people in both places doing great things. Im speaking more about the majority.

    • mik

      What a little hottie!