Despite the fact that I never excelled at dirty talk, and was therefore not best suited to phone sex, I did acquire several regular callers during my time as a phone sex operator. The most interesting of the bunch would have to be Dave, the sound effects man. He was also the most disgusting.
Dave didn’t actually do sound effects. As far as I know, that career basically died with radio plays. But he certainly enjoyed them. Every time Dave called I knew my ingenuity would be stretched just a bit further than the last time.
Things with Dave started out innocently enough. He didn’t even call me until I had nearly a month of phone sex experience under my belt. At that point, I was confident I could deal with anything anyone could fling at me. I was not prepared for this.
To start, Dave had a very, very thick accent. This made him notable because the vast majority of my callers spoke in unaccented American English. Every so often, I encountered an accent from the sticks south of the Mason-Dixon line that threw me, but beyond that I had grown used to understanding everything nearly every caller said.
Dave, though, was a completely different story.
