I am not normally one for exercises of state power. However, I feel it might be warranted for the FBI to bust down the door to this kid’s mansion and teach him a valuable lesson in manners.
Peter Brant II, one half of an entity known as “The Brant Brothers,” had a rather predictable response to Obama’s win, for a 1%-er: he wasn’t happy about it. (For those who don’t know who The Brant Brothers are, I envy you. But if you insist on finding out, they’re the foppish, decadent-late-capitalist, teenage sons of Stephanie Seymour and Peter Brant I, and are famous primarily because the media fucking hates you.)
He was so unhappy about it, in fact, that he revealed a bit of the craven nastiness lurking just beneath the surface of every shallow and entitled child of privilege: he sent the above text message, found it worth screencapping, and posted it to Instagram, at which point Jezebel’s Jenna Sauers took a screencap of her own for your viewing displeasure.
“Guess we’re poor now,” said his friend Andrew WarrenÂ out of some misguided fear that Obama would tax the wealthy even a fraction of what they paid under Ike Eisenhower. “I have a contingency plan, kill Obama hahaha,” replied Peter, which was indeed funny, because it’s not like the president hasn’t had numerous actual threats of assassination or anything. (Or like Amerikkka has a history of murdering prominent black leaders.)
But, as Dan Savage might say, “it gets better.” “At least women have rights! Oh wait, I don’t care!” said Warren. “Hahahahaha exactly!” replied Brant. Because they’re dudes, get it? And men do not care about women’s rights! HIGH-larious, these two.
While it might be possible to take this text exchange as an example of young Peter’s “evolved” sense of meta-humor (“What a clever boy, making fun of his own shitty image!”), the image’s comment threadÂ gives me pause, as Brant’s comments include calling someone “a nobody loser with no life” and telling someone else to jump off a cliff. But as annoyed I am that he inflicted this nonsense on the world, I’m happy there’s finally some irrefutable evidence that Peter Brant II is not, in fact, a special and precocious snowflake, but just as mean and immature as any 15-year-old popular kid with a limited world view.
And like I said, the FBI is not amused by jokes like these. Please, please, please let this kid spend a night in an interrogation room as punishment for his supreme priggishness.