The Gloss’s 10 Sexiest People Alive

sexiest men people

I mean, People magazine is dumb with their little list. They are dumb, and they are consistently wrong, and this premise was already covered very effectively in The B in Apt 23 so I don’t think I need to say much more. At TheGloss we really felt we could do this better, unfortunately, we disagreed about pretty much everything, so we’re just going to toss some stuff at you. Also, I’m not very good at graffiti doodles, so, while I see where I was going with the devil horns on Channing Tatum, I’m not so sure about the angel wings.

We have a lot of different people, because unlike People, we accept all kinds. Also, I’m not going to tell you which writers came up with which people, because, hive mind.

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    • Candace

      I’ve never been too certain about the pronunciation of Ralph Fiennes’ name BUT I say his last name “Fines.” So being fine is basically his name. Also, did you see Skyfall? How many guys can rock a receding hairline like that?

      • Michelle

        Its “Rafe” like rake but with and ‘F’.

      • Candace

        But his last name???

        (also, I always thought the first name was “ray.” Like the lph was silent? I’m dumb. Thank you for knowing stuff)

      • Ashley Cardiff

        Totally “Rafe.” Same goes for the protagonist in Lord of the Flies.

    • Ashley Cardiff

      God I want to know who said H Jon so we can be forever friends.

      • Guest


    • Lizzie

      I think you could have done a more thorough job of researching hot historical guys if the conclusion was Louis XV. What about Nathaniel Hawthorne? or Albert Camus? or Alexander Hamilton, “Federalist Hunk”?

      • Amanda Chatel

        Camus! Love.

      • Jennifer Wright

        Alexander Hamilton was hot, but also feeble ( Also, Louis XV, as an orphaned child, carried his pet cat into council meetings with him. He referred to him as “my colleague.” Otherwise he remained entirely silent. I CHALLENGE YOUR HEART NOT TO MELT.

      • Stella L.

        Man, it’s so obvious but I would totally bang Camus.

      • Ashley Cardiff

        Kierkegaard was a fox, too.

    • Maggie

      Aaron Paul. He’s the only meth dealer I’d ever let wife me.

    • Stella L.

      I love Aaron Paul!

    • boo


      • Jennifer Wright

        You a hufflepuff, too?

    • Sabrina

      Seriously, no one mentioned Jude Law?! Or Matthew McFayden? I mean, just look at him.

    • Alle

      I’m imaginarily banging Benedict Cumberbatch RIGHT NOW.