• Mon, Dec 3 2012

Harlotry: My Return To Sex Work

I never exactly quit phone sex. I didn’t hand in my two weeks’ notice, I didn’t even tell my boss I was quitting. I just sort of gradually stopped having my lines on for as long as I once did. I barely had my lines on for the minimum thirty hours one week, the next week I made less than thirty, and by the second week I didn’t turn them on at all. I was letting things lapse right and left. I stayed in bed for days, getting up only to refresh the contents of my teacup. Were I to have had the energy, I might have spent my days making friends with Messrs. Daniels and Jameson, but I couldn’t even stand the stupor of alcohol. I spent days sleeping fitfully and trying to read, but I couldn’t keep my attention on a page.

I left the house once or twice a week; even a trip to the grocery store was a Herculean labor that required a lengthy nap afterwards. Phone sex had crippled me but the lack of any real work was threatening to kill me.

Besides that, Stanley and I didn’t really have the money to survive off a single income. Too surly and taciturn to succeed in interviews, and not experienced enough to get by on only a flashy resume, Stanley did very little but sit at home playing endless rounds of Call of Duty, smoking cigarette after cigarette, drinking Coca Cola, eating junk food, and collecting unemployment. I suppose there must have been something I saw in him, but today I’m at an utter loss as to what exactly that might have been. I’m also sure his complete lack of appreciation for my tireless efforts to make the ends of each check meet must have contributed to my exhaustion and eventual inability to continue exerting the effort.

No, things weren’t going so well for me.

(photo via NYDN)

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  • Jon

    Another great article in the series! They definitely help make Mondays a little more bearable.

  • EKS

    yikes, sorry to get a little off topic (i haven’t followed this series) but i hope you haven’t stayed with this fellow!

    • breezy

      I think we are about to get to (what will be) the best part in this series, which is when she dumps him. Can’t wait!

    • Cate

      You know, I haven’t gone too in-depth to the relationship, its deeply fucked up idiosyncrasies, its end, its aftermath, and my recovery because it would take an entire five thousand word essay (which I have written) to even touch on it, but if there is interest I can bring it up with Ashley.

    • Cate

      No, no, no. He’s a shitbag, legit.

      I have found someone who is one hundred times the man Mr. Kowalski (not his real last name, but where his pseudonym comes from) is.

    • http://www.facebook.com/MatthewMcVeagh Matthew McVeagh

      I love your devastating comparisons. :)

  • Meggie

    it’s funny how getting out of the only things sheltering you from the world can make you feel so much more in control!

  • Grant M

    ever heard the song reclamation by Fugazi? And then the next song Nice New Outfit. Very apropos.