• Wed, Jan 2 2013

Fashion Disasters: Kim Kardashian Already Doing Horrible Maternity Wear

Kim Kardashian rings in the New Year at 1 Oak Nightclub at The Mirage Resort and Casino Las Vegas, NV

Kim Kardashian is pregnant. Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are expecting a baby. Kim Kardashian is still famous and we (and you, frankly) are complicit. This is a lot to take in.

Anyway, Kim Kardashian wore the above outfit to usher in the new year (in Las Vegas, naturally) and we’d like to point out that, as of that moment, it officially counted as maternity wear. This almost certainly did too, which makes us huge dicks for picking on pregnant ladies. :(

Which is to say: sweet god in heaven. The next nine months are going to be long, guys, but can we really take Kim Kardashian’s wardrobe becoming even more ridiculous? More urgent for the attention of millions of strangers? More cinched, more see-through, more garish, more… (shudder) on-trend?

Other important questions:

  • Will Kanye continue to dress her?
  • What will the inevitable maternity collection be called?
  • Does anyone want to join our betting pool on how many endorsement deals she gets out of this?
  • Will she debut the baby on the cover of People? (But her brand is so much more Us!)
  • Will she debut the baby at 3 days or perhaps 4?
  • Can you take QuickTrim while pregnant or nursing?

As Sam pointed out this morning, the Kimye spawn will probably not be on camera (let’s all have a deep, satisfying laugh at that together, shall we?) but that doesn’t Kim won’t exploit this poor kid to hell and back. And, though Weight Watchers deals, baby furniture and magazine covers are indeed sure to follow, the exploitation of this future wearer of fur Lanvin baby booties will start with Kim’s very own wardrobe. How many ways will she call attention to her growing belly?

…Our guess is cutouts.

Here’s one more New Years Ever shot, with Kim’s perpetually grumpy baby daddy:

Kim Kardashian rings in the New Year at 1 Oak Nightclub at The Mirage Resort and Casino Las Vegas, NV(Photos via Wenn)

 

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  • JackMeoff6969

    It has been learned from “unidentified sources” that the b astard fetus is a boy. Kanye and Kim have decided to name the b astard Barack Hussein Kardashian-West. In about 35 years, it is anticipated that he will become President of the USA.

  • JackMeoff6969

    I, for one, am looking forward to seeing pictures of Kim in her eighth month of pregnancy. If you think that she has a fat a$$ now, you ain’t seen nothing yet!