Apparently It’s Okay To Mock JWoww’s Cellulite

Jenni Jwoww Farley hosts New Year's Rockin' Eve 2013 in Times Square

If you’ve ever watched The Jersey Shore, you might be aware that the cast is almost completely comprised of morons and dickheads. They have terrible taste (Ed Hardy clothes! Red Bull cocktails!), they refer to unattractive women as “grenades,” they cheat on their significant others with strangers in hottubs, they scream and scratch and gnash at one another in drunken blowouts. Snooki, for one, needs no introduction and neither does The Situation. That said, we’ve always had a weird soft spot for JWoww.

Still. Even if we didn’t have a weird soft spot for JWoww, we’d be bummed by how people are responding to these New Years Eve photos of her. The set depicts JWoww, in the midst of hosting some MTV New Years function, wearing a tiny, sheer-in-places blue sequined dress. She was shot from below (already kind of a dick move if your subject is in a dress that short) and behind. The criss-cross of lighting in the studio embellishes what appears to be cellulite on her upper thighs:

Jenni Jwoww Farley hosts New Year's Rockin' Eve 2013 in Times Square

For one, that really could just be lighting. But it doesn’t matter if it is.

We’re here to tell you: that’s normal. Jwoww is a person with a person body. Rather than these photos exposing the fact that JWoww is some kind of hideous monster who shouldn’t be allowed outside, they mostly reflect the fact that a photographer took advantage of his subject and sold some unflattering photos of said subject, who happened to be a marginally famous person. They are unflattering photos of a woman, nothing more.

Wardrobe malfunctions are one thing (and we’re a fashion site, so we have to be very interested in them)–but it seems that the subtext of the coverage of this particular wardrobe malfunction is that JWoww’s thighs should look different.

Just because she’s JWoww–just because she’s a part of the whole reality TV trash machine and she wears shimmery golden scarves for shirts–doesn’t mean it’s suddenly okay to mock her non-airbrushed body. The only people who should be shocked by these photos are the people who look at MAXIM magazine spreads and see anything other than crudely fashioned collages of make believe people.

So, to pre-empt any trolls (how’s misandry treating you these days, fellas?), can we all just agree that making people feel bad about their bodies is bad… even if those people strike us as unsavory? And that, “Your thighs don’t look the way I expect them to all the time!” is not a legitimate criticism? And, frankly, that has nothing to do with fashion?

(Photos via Wenn)

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    • Alle

      I love that there’s this weird idea in the media that cellulite is some hideous abnormality when as far I know, most people have it. It’s way less common to NOT have any. And it’s way less common than THAT to look like your skin has been botoxed and buffed and polished like a marble floor, then vacuum-sealed around your body, ie: the current standard for Hollywood actresses.

      So if we all have it, why is it seen as so horrible? It seems so arbitrary. What are tabloids going to go after next? Will we one day open a magazine to discover that some shadowy editor has decided that TOES are unseemly, despite almost every person having them? And then we can read article about the best toe surgeries to remove them because OMG SO UGLY? I don’t get it.

      • Sarah!

        Dude, toes are pretty gross when you think about it.

      • Ashley Cardiff

        That’s how it starts!

      • Alle

        I would rather look at cellulite than feet. Ex-ballerina real talk.

        Oh god, am I foot shaming? I AM PART OF THE PROBLEM.

      • Samantha_Escobar

        I would rather look at toes than ears. Ears are the only body part I’m cool with collectively shaming. They’re all (ALL) so weird.

      • Sarah!

        This is true, too. That’s why we have to disguise them with jewels.

    • Kate Richlin-Zack

      I get super angry about the tabloids’ “celebrity bikini body” features. Grr…

    • lucygoosey74

      “crudely fashioned collages of make believe people” nails it! And not just in Maxim, of course.

      • Ashley Cardiff

        Yes, actually, you’re right: that applies to all images in magazines.

    • Tania

      Re: the trolls thing. I had my computer off for most of a month, and haven’t been reading the Gloss for a while, but now I’ve come back after the hiatus to catch up and there is like a ridiculous number of men commenting about how this website sucks, how all you women suck, about how misandrist you are… Did someone link you to some men’s rights website, or something? The men’s rights subreddit on Reddit, maybe?

      It’s so weird.

      Also, I am pretty thin and I still get those little back-of-the-thigh ripples. It’s just one of those things real, unphotoshopped women have, like skin folds.

      • Ashley Cardiff

        And pores!

      • kj

        Yeah, I think the trolls do like some sort of revolving campaign of website harassment. It’s nuts!

      • Elise

        Gotta be honest… I love the trolls? I never know what crazy thing they will say next or in regards to which random article. I’m actually wasting way too much time trying to find troll comments as they pop up. Where are these coming from? Why are you here?!! You know what… I’m going to ask them.

      • Tania

        Haha. I sub to a subreddit called “Creepy PMs,” and every once in a while a post will get linked to the “men’s rights” subreddit and what will happen looks exactly like what’s happening on the Gloss.

      • Elise

        My current theory? This is the result of a united coalition of all TheGloss contributors’ ex-partners.

      • Tania

        Aww, I like to think the Gloss ladies have better taste than to date men who are secretly super misogynist.

    • kj

      Love the dress, and frankly, her legs look pretty damn good to me… but is it shaming to say I could do without seeing her ass?

      Then again, blame the photog for taking the picture in the first place I guess.

    • Eileen

      Hey now. I don’t think the cast is composed of morons! They’re just on a reality show, and maybe not of the same social class as many of the readers of this site. And I will not mock Jenni’s cellulite.

      I will, however, mock the fact that only her lips move when she is talking because her face is made of plastic.

    • Miss Andry

      Nobody made her wear that dress. She chose it in order to promote her sex appeal. Instead she merely advertised that she is not as appealing as her chosen dress implies. Don’t blame men…it is her own vanity that causes the ridicule.

      • Ashley Cardiff

        Where did I blame men?

      • Elise

        Who are you? Why are you here? I just want to understand…

      • Gabs

        I seriously doubt she was expecting some asshole to look up her skirt and take a picture. She’s a beautiful woman with a rockin’ body, and the fact that someone was cruel enough to emphasize her imperfections, doesn’t prove otherwise in any way. She actually seems to be a nice, responsible person, too…it would be quite another thing entirely if she were a horrible, shallow person.

    • britt

      do you realize this was photo shopped and she recently made a video showing her ass?…..u guys are dumb!

    • Brianne Williams

      Soo we’re ignoring the shit she’s done to her face? Ok

    • Ryan

      PHOTOSHOPPED!!! Plain n simple.