It’s okay… because they’re boys.
It’s hard to believe that anyone would make a joke about rape. Even drunk, high, fucked-up beyond belief, it’s truly astonishing that a human being could mock a rape victim in such a degrading and horrifying way like we’ve all seen in the viral video starring Michael Nodianos. But he did, it was taped, he tweeted his own “wise cracks” and Anonymous took their brand of vigilantism all the way by exposing him as he drunkenly “joked” about the incident.
But hey, Nodianos wasn’t part of this alleged “rape crew,” so we can’t get too mad at him, right? Unlike fellow students Trent Mays and Ma’lik Richmond, Nodianos wasn’t charged with anything, so him making light of the situation with a bunch of his buddies is totally acceptable! Why? Because boys will be boys, and that’s what boys do; or at least this is what society has taught us.
Boys are made of “snips and snails and puppy dogs’ tails,” while girls, as we know, are made of “sugar and spice, and everything nice.” Boys are dirty, immature and only think with their dick; they’re primal in their behavior, sexual, aggressive and if the jails prove anything, they’re far more prone to violence than women. But they’re boys; this is what boys are, this is what they do, and for that we should dismiss their actions and words. It’s their gender that gives them permission to get away things that women never would, and it’s this persistent mentality, this allowance of acceptance of such an antiquated belief that has created a monster issue within our society. From bullying to rape culture, “boys will be boys,” is often an excuse, and it needs to stop.
As I read everything I could get my hands on when it came to the Steubenville case, it was in the comments section of a few sites where I found the real disgust. It was one thing to watch a video of Nodianos hard at work trying to make his friends laugh with his vulgar and horrifying “jokes,” it was even further stomach-turning to see Richmond’s mother tastelessly post “Free speech this one for u get to let a whore b a whore Lmao…” on her Facebook wall, but what really pushed my already seething temperament over the edge were the comments from strangers that dismissed Nodianos’ behavior.
Although our comment section here at TheGloss didn’t share the opinions of some commenters on other sites, I was surprised to see the following two comments, in particular, on Jezebel:
“This is just boys being stupid because they are too young to understand the seriousness of the situation.”
“Yes, it’s tasteless and twisted and offensive. But as far as we know, it’s also just talk. As awful as these guys are — particularly the leading player, Mr. Buckeye — they are not necessarily the same guys who perpetrated this awful crime or were part of the so-called “rape crew.” They’re probably just a bunch of dumb high school kids, most likely drunk and/or stoned, making terrible jokes.
And as hard as it may be to admit it, this is how most people deal with tragedy when they’re among friends.”
I’m sorry. Come again? Are we excusing them? We have “just boys being stupid,” and “this is how most people deal with tragedy when they’re among friends.”
