Without getting too deep into it, Farrah Abraham starred on the first season of 16 & Pregnant (eventually spinning off to Teen Mom) and didn’t exactly ingratiate herself to viewers. In between throwing fits when her mother wouldn’t babysit so she could go party, she was plotting her d-List career (rumors of a fling with DJ Pauly D!) and getting rhinoplasty and breast implants for a better bikini body. She’s an aspiring model, you see.
Anyway. Apparently she’s become frustrated existing within Teen Mom‘s relative pop culture obscurity and so figured out a foolproof plan of getting people to pay attention to her despite a conspicuous lack of talent (the Kardashian Method): being horrible.
Yes, Farrah Abraham just filed a blog post about “the issue” of her three year old daughter’s unibrow:
SOOOOOooooo, this is a touchy subject the Unibrow thing.
But recently I could not ignore it, like I know I’ve seen madonna’s duaghter have a stand out uni brow, I remember when I was little I had a unibrow, but I couldn’t remember if there was an age limit, a rule!
So here I am faced with a standout historical moment in motherhood when I can confirm to myself that my little, adorable,most cuddle-able cutie, baby girl has a Unibrow :( , I felt bad for her, and I started asking friends…. is this hair just going to fall out… is it just hormones at this age?, well the hair didn’t go away and others started saying it was here to stay.
So, that’s how she sets it up. Here’s how she “fixes” her toddler’s imperfections:
So I told sophia (my daughter who is a late 3 years old) of the little issue on her brow, and I showed her how I waxed mine off, so I tryed to wax her, the second a dab hit the Uni, she touch it with the towel she had in her hand,
UHHH so now, wax was in the towel, and I yanked it back ASAP, but fuzz was not stuck to the wax stuck to her Uni, OMG moment, So now sophia was freaking out, so I had to act like it was a cool science project to get the wax off.
PLOT TO END THIS: Sophia feel a sleep, I got my tweezers and Pluck-pluck-pluck……soph was now saying ouch or anything and still was asleep, I got most of it off and then finally she woke up..I went to sleep .
The next morning I showed her and told her how well she did and she didn’t even know, She was more intrigued now to be ok with upkeeping her non-unibrow. I could tell she was proud.
Let’s see that one more time: I could tell she was proud.
First of all, why is it a problem for a three year old to have a uni-brow? Is it hurting her dating prospects?!
Look, we don’t have kids. Thus, every time we write about something having to do with the wellbeing of young children (children on diets, child models, erotic child modeling, etc), we’re often surprised to learn in the comments section that we got it extremely wrong (and that we’re horrible, ugly feminazi libtards). There is the small possibility, though, that parents are uniquely crazy in comment threads.
Which is a long way of saying that we don’t really trust our instincts anymore…
But this is fucking crazy, right?