Why I Refuse To Get A Facebook


People always seem shocked when they realize I don’t have a Facebook.

Like, shocked.

Yet, I find myself shocked when I read stuff like this.

So why don’t I have a Facebook, you ask? What is wrong with me?

I promise I’m not a luddite. Though I did just take a break from writing this to read the Wikipedia article on the original Luddites, and they actually seem kind of awesome. See? I use the internet quite frequently! I waste time reading probably-inaccurate entries on Wikipedia. I also have a Twitter account. I run my own blog. I have a Tumblr. I have a fancy phone and a big TV. I’m basically Zenon: Girl of the 21st Century.


Destroy the machine!

Because all these things are useful to me. Twitter gives me a convenient place to keep track of silly little thoughts I have, that might inspire me later. My blogs motivate me to write daily, even when no is paying me to. But I’ve never felt that anything in my life could be made easier by Facebook. I think of technology as a tool, and Facebook seems to me more like a frivolity. But everyone and their mother has a Facebook these days. Everyone and their mother’s mother.

To help me understand, I asked some of my close friends why they personally use Facebook. I got a few unique responses, but most of the answers boiled down to “So I can see what distant relatives/acquaintances are up to.” And I guess it’s obvious that Facebook certainly makes doing that easy. However, I’m not convinced that people would care about the daily happenings of “distant relative/acquaintances” if Facebook hadn’t created such an easy way to acquire the information. Isn’t your level of concern what differentiates a mere acquaintance from a friend?

It also seems to me that when you use Facebook, that in addition to keeping yourself updated on acquaintances, you also make yourself concerned that your acquaintances, be they your best friend or your best friend’s cousin’s college roommate, perceive you on this platform. And you care how they perceive you.

Share This Post:
    • Cate

      I am so glad I am not the only American (you are American, right?) below the age of forty five who has no Facebook.

      • Candace

        I am all American.

    • Samantha

      I don’t have a facebook and I refuse to get one. I am also under the age of 45. My office wanted all the employees to have one so we could “friend” our company facebook. I won’t do it. Even my mom is hassling me about not having it and she is 63.

    • MR

      A human ant colony. Zuckerberg is the queen.

    • Breezy

      I joined many years ago when it was still for high school and college students only, but have since deleted it. It just got too overwhelming. Twenty years ago, no one knew what their bus buddy from kindergarten was up to and that was fine. People just kept on living their lives, with a reasonable amount of information regarding the people they gave a shit about. That was really what clenched it for me: realizing that the people who actually care about me will call and text, and we don’t need Facebook in order to remain friends.

      So I’m going on three years Facebook free! And yes, people are just shocked that I deleted it.

    • elle

      I don’t have a FB profile either. Don’t care about anybody’s business and no one needs to be in mine. Especially if I haven’t had any contact with you in years!

    • http://twitter.com/MathildeHoeg Mathilde Hoeg Boisen

      I have one. Partly because I am narcissistic and partly because it’s a great co-ordination tool for school, events, parties etc.
      I do however have it as a strict rule that the only people I am friends with on facebook are people I would actually stop and a a conversation with if I met them in real life. So far it’s working out pretty well.

    • msenesac

      I have one and check it hourly… but am definitely getting tired of it. Do I really need to know you are about to start the laundry? No. But I do like to see pictures people post. And it’s been useful getting advice (esp with the baby). But facebook has been a serious buzzkill since my mother-in-law joined it.

    • becca weber

      actually studies have shown FB profiles are more authentic (at least in your peer’s eyes) than any other social media

    • Anonymous

      I have two main reasons I like Facebook. A) Networking. It keeps me in touch with ex-coworkers who otherwise probably wouldn’t take the effort to stay connected, and these sustained connections have twice gotten me new jobs. B) My friends regularly post links to interesting, funny articles I’d never have stumbled across otherwise. That said, I probably hide more of my “friends” from my feed than most. I only want to read updates from people I’m close to anyway.

    • http://folkmaktnu.wordpress.com/ FolkmaktNu

      Wonderful writing!

      Facebook is killing your true self. Please, have some pride!
      You don’t have to strip your self naked to the world to be okey!

    • TWD

      Facebook & Twitter users announce when they’re going to take a …. oops … do their daily ablutions, yet jump up and down about Homeland Security having cameras and drones flying about.

      People that use FB for truly ‘keeping up with family’ is fine, but why accept friends of friends of friends as ‘friends’???

      Twitter is worse. I don’t care if you’re looking for a restroom.

    • St8kout

      I shutdown my fecesbook page when they PURPOSELY censored the Navy Seals page, twice, when the Seals tried to reveal what really happened at Benghazi on 9/11. This was before the election and fecesbook had to protect their boy from bad press, esp. when the white house was busy sending out talking points to their friends in the press that it was all due to a video, which has since been proven false.
      Of course, after the election, fecesbook claims it was an accident, BOTH times. Yeah, right.