Poll: Could You Ever Date Somebody Who Might Cheat On You?

LeAnn-Rimes-Eddie-Cibrian

I so did not want to post about the LeAnn Rimes – Eddie Cibrian love debacle, but alas, I could not help it because this one quote kept bothering me. While talking to Entertainment Tonight, Rimes was asked about whether or not she felt her husband, Cibrian, might cheat on her. Considering the pair met and began seeing one another on the set of Northern Lights when each was already married, the question isn’t incredibly far-fetched (though I sort of doubt many magazines will be asking Cibrian the same question anytime soon).

“I would be ignorant to say, and everyone else would be think I am a liar, if I wouldn’t say yes,“ she said. “I have at times… It has definitely creeped into my mind. Like I think it would anyone’s.”

My initial reaction was one of confusion: How could you stay married to somebody you’re afraid might cheat on you? Why would you bother putting yourself through the anxiety that accompanies that fear? Is this really a fear that affects everybody?

But then I remembered that, for more than one relationship, I was afraid that my significant other would be unfaithful. Actually, no. I was terrified. It just seemed like the most heartbreaking thing and, indeed, it was when it happened. And those were just fairly youthful relationships that had no expectation of a permanent committment; to imagine feeling that fear about my husband or wife sounds much more frightening, and actually experiencing being cheated on by a spouse sounds just about unbearable.

And yet when you love somebody, the risks seem worth it, right? So we look past the potential for disaster and try to see things as potentially amazing rather than for the tragedies they can become. Plus, as we’ve established previously, there are lots of options in the event that he or she does cheat. Nevertheless, I am still skeptical on whether or not I could feel anxious about my partner cheating and still maintain a healthy-feeling relationship. But what about you folks?

Could you stay in a relationship if you were afraid the person you're with might be unfaithful?

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    • Fabel

      I have a serious cynical/paranoid streak, so I can’t ever see myself as being one of those “With our love, cheating is impossible!” people. I actually think she’s being pretty realistic & honest about her own feelings. It’s not necessarily a living-in-fear thing; it’s just acknowledging that the possibility exists.

      • Samantha_Escobar

        Like I said, I was in constant fear that my partner was going to cheat on me (he had an issue with lying, so it wasn’t exactly implausible nor unexpected) and I think that made me even more paranoid than I already was. As much as I want to believe that when I finally am with somebody on a theoretically permanent level I’ll have to trust them, I will likely have it in the back of my mind as a possibility. As long as they’re just thoughts, not suspicions, I think it’s okay.

    • Maggie

      I think there’s a possibility of cheating with any relationship – that’s not to say that every man or woman is going to cheat, but everyone is capable of it. If you trust your partner, it shouldn’t be a problem, but like Fabel said, acknowledging the possibility and talking about it with your partner is realistic and a sign of a healthy relationship.

      My ex cheated on me, so when things with my fiance got serious I was paranoid that he’d inevitably cheat, too. We talked about it and I made it clear what my expectations are (mainly, if you cheat, we’re done) and we have great open communication and honesty, so that fear is gone now. However, if I was with someone who I knew would definitely cheat on me, there’s no way I could continue to date that person. Cheating is the WORST.

    • alexandra

      I am terrified that my boyfriend will cheat on me. He has cheated on almost everyone he’s dated, but they also all cheated on him and were awful. I’m confused about why he dates me, because I am not awful and would never cheat on him, so I guess that’s what gives me the hope that this relationship is different. Maybe I think a little too much of myself (; But all both his exes hated me while they were dating because of how he talked about me…

      Oh god I sound like I’m in high school. I graduated college. I promise.

    • Cate

      I have been cheated on, once, when I was very young and it shockingly did not devastate me. This may have been because I was very young, or it may have been because the cheating was just the last piece of the ‘this guy is not worth my time’ puzzle, but I just ended the relationship and kept it moving.
      That said, I really do think cheating, however it is defined by the people in the relationship, is one of the most dishonorable, awful things anyone can do and is only excusable if it is literally the only way to leave the relationship (this is rare, but I have seen it happen). I have trouble respecting friends who cheat on their partners, and I really don’t think I could stay with someone who cheated on me as it betrays a distinct lack of respect both for one’s partner and oneself.

    • MissR

      Even though my boyfriend the type of person who would instantly break up with you if he felt any kind of serious attraction to somebody else, my own past relationship baggage makes me super uneasy about cheating. Anytime he works late, or goes home to visit family without me I get pretty freaked out, but he’s wonderful and worth the occasional terror.

    • http://twitter.com/SweetHeartHolly Holly

      To me, the best thing for anyone in this situation to do is to just
      focus on yourself since you are the only person that you can control.
      Don’t worry about what everyone else is up to or saying. If anyone else
      gets themselves into a hole while trying to make another person look
      bad, they won’t have anyone but themselves to blame.

      God bless LeAnn always!

      Holly in East Tennessee (a day one fan of her).

      P.S. I can’t wait to get the Spitfire album! We need more traditional country music on the radio!