• Tue, Mar 5 2013

Relpax® Migraine Relief Thinks Women Really Love Mopping

Untitled

I ripped this ad out of a magazine. Observe the world of Relpax®.

It’s 9 a.m., and black-and-white woman has a migraine. Look at her, sitting on her kitchen footstool, head in hands!

Because this is what I would do if I had a migraine at 9 a.m. I wouldn’t stay in bed. No, because my kitchen calls! I MUST MOP IT. I have little regard for my own pain, only for my linoleum and those who will judge me by its cleanliness!

Then, black-and-white woman takes Relpax®, and the world turns to color! Mostly orange. The world turns mostly orange. The clock reads 11 a.m.

Mostly-orange-woman doesn’t use this opportunity to change her clothes (orange!), go to work, take a nice bath, hit the library, or go for a run. No! FINALLY, SHE CAN MOP. She also seems to have combed her bangs.

Look at her smile — weak, forced. “I’m already wearing my orange button-down over a gray t-shirt, and my sneakers with no laces. It’s nice that they gave me the medicine. Sure, mopping sounds good. I can mop. I’ll mop, I’ll do it, I swear! Please make the doctor stop giving me the headaches. Why did I spend two hours sitting on a tiny kitchen stool?”

Relpax®: For women who live in a false dichotomy in which migraines and mopping are the only available options.

Share This Post:
  • Samantha Easter

    Some people just have different priorities. Thankfully the rest of us and can over the world, and wear a nice suit.

  • http://beholdconfusion.wordpress.com/ beholdconfusion

    I’ve done stranger things than sit on a tiny kitchen stool for 2 hours when I’ve had a headache. I once ate most of a bag of marshmallows and called it “therapeutic.” But when that elated high caused by the meeting of the cessation of pain and the kicking in of prescription drugs finally rolls around, I can think of some better things to do than mop a dirty floor.