Crowdsourcing: What Kind Of Haircut Should I Get Tomorrow?


For the past few years, my hair and I have been engaged in a viciously boring cycle, and it goes a little something like this: hair gets too long, cut it a little. Bangs get too long, cut them a little. That is it. That’s the whole thing. Exciting, I know.

My talented friend Mischa is cutting my hair tomorrow as part of my birthday beautification routine, and I feel I should take this opportunity to do something a little bit different. Something bold. Something that reflects my cranky yet fun loving personality, and maybe the fact that I love Joy Division. But I have no idea what. I’ve had the same haircut for so long that I’m not even sure I know how to look any other way.

To refresh your memory, here is how my hair looks right now (don’t let the filter fool you, it’s all one color):

hair5I have bangs, which look nice when I maintain them, and the rest of it just kind of hangs there, getting tangled. I have a lot of hair, but it’s extremely fine. It’s also really straight. So what’s to be done about it? Here are some options.

The other night, I was watching a miniseries about European anarchists, and I thought one of the anarchists had pretty hair, at least until she got caught committing acts of terrorism against the state and went to prison camp (they don’t let you have pretty hair in prison camp):



That’s probably not the lesson I was supposed to take from it, but I took some screenshots anyway.

Then I looked at them again, and thought, “Oh God, does that anarchist have ‘the Karlie’”?

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That anarchist totally has “the Karlie.”

I’m also kind of into the idea of a severe, black bob like Uma Thurman had in Pulp Fiction:


But the last time I got a bob, it looked perfect the day I got it and shitty every day after that, because I am terrible at styling my own hair. So my haircut needs to be low maintenance.

I am also considering some sort of ’70s shag haircut a la Jane Fonda (or, in a more rock and roll context, Joan Jett), but my hair is really thin, so I’m afraid I’d end up with a fashion mullet.

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I kind of like Alexa Chung‘s hair, but that might just be because I think she’s pretty and cool (are we still into the ombre thing?):

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Lastly, I liked the haircut of the girl who didn’t want me to take her picture last weekend:

hair7I realize this is not so different from my current hair, only shinier. Maybe I just want to dye my hair black again? I haven’t had black hair in a while. At least five years, I’d say.

So, yeah. I kind of hoped the mere act of writing this post would bring me closer to a decision, but it has not. Not even a little. I hope you will leave me some helpful advice in the comments.

Photos: WENN

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    • Samantha Escobar

      Anarchist Karlie hair!

    • Sami Jankins
      • Samantha

        That’s cute! I vote that too!

    • JT

      Something super short and fun but keep the bangs! I love bangs! And hey, if you’re going to cut off a significant length (8+ inches) and your hair hasn’t been processed, please think about donating it, like to Pantene’s Beautiful Lengths. It’s awesome and so are you!

    • Shalilah Russell

      Get it cut in layers and try sweeping bangs to the side. It will look more spicey. Black would look good but get a newer style. I’m trying to let my short haircut grow out but I’ll probably resort to snipping it into a style as it grows.

    • Jenny
    • Katri Haas

      Jane Fonda!

    • Magda Nunez

      From what you’ve said, I think the Alexa Chung hair could work, like with the fine texture I am imagining your hair has. And from pictures you’ve shared on here I think it would complement your face nicely… That being said, I also think you’re bad ass enough to rock the Uma Thurman pulp fiction hair, first day and days there after.

    • Nancy

      Get the Karlie, but dye it red! Like Connie Britton red! I think that’d look nice on you

    • Fabel

      If your natural texture is straight, then I think you actually could totally pull off the one-length Uma Thurman bob? Wouldn’t it kind of just fall naturally in that case? (I know you’re saying last time you did that, it looked terrible, but I feel like taking advantage of the straight-ness of your hair is the way to go here)

    • Vanessa Di Palma

      The Karlie, 100%

    • MR

      Jane and Gene. Klute and the French Connection. Which style did you go with in the end? I think Uma’s a lot sexier when her hair’s long.